Mother in Diner: [to Melanie] Why are they doing this? Why are they doing this? They said when you got here the whole thing started. Who are you? What are you? Where did you come from? I think you're the cause of all of this. I think you're evil. EVI...
Annie Hayworth: Don't they ever stop migrating?
Melanie Daniels: Just what is it you're looking for, sir? Mitch Brenner: Lovebirds. Melanie Daniels: Lovebirds, sir? Mitch Brenner: Yes. I understand there are different varieties. Is that true? Melanie Daniels: Oh yes, there are. Mitch Brenner: Well...
Mitch Brenner: I just thought you might like to know what it's like to be on the other end of a gag. What do you think of that? Melanie Daniels: I think you're a louse. Mitch Brenner: I am.
Doomsayer in diner: It's the end of the world
Traveling Salesman at Diner's Bar: Gulls are scavengers, anyway. Most birds are. Get yourselves guns and wipe them off the face of the earth! Mrs. Bundy, elderly ornithologist: That would hardly be possible. Deke Carter - Diner Owner: Why not, Mrs. B...
Melanie Daniels: Get Cathy and Lydia out of here!
Annie Hayworth: Did you drive up from San Francisco by the coast road? Melanie Daniels: Yes. Annie Hayworth: Nice drive. Melanie Daniels: It's very beautiful. Annie Hayworth: Is that where you met Mitch? Melanie Daniels: Yes. Annie Hayworth: I guess ...
Mitch Brenner: I'd like to see you. Maybe we could go swimming or something. Mother tells me you like to swim. Melanie Daniels: How does Mother know what I like to do? Mitch Brenner: I guess we read the same gossip columns.
Melanie Daniels: On Mondays and Wednesdays I work for the Travelers Aid at the airport. Mitch Brenner: Helping travelers? Melanie Daniels: No, misdirecting them.
Mother in Diner: Why are they doing this? Why are they doing this? They said when you got here, the whole thing started. Who are you? What are you? Where did you come from? I think you're the cause of all this. I think you're evil! EVIL!
Cathy Brenner: Mitch, can I bring the lovebirds in here? Lydia Brenner: No! Cathy Brenner: But Mom, they're in a cage. Lydia Brenner: They're birds, aren't they?
Melanie Daniels: [worriedly, as she sees a man from the restaurant window lighting his cigar as gasoline is leaking around him] Look at the gas, that man's lighting a cigar!
Sebastian Sholes, fisherman in diner: Hell, maybe we're all getting a little carried away with this. Admittedly a few birds did act strange, but that's no reason to... Melanie Daniels: I keep telling you, this isn't 'a few birds'! These are gulls, cr...
Mitch Brenner: See 'ya in court!
Lydia Brenner: [reacting to Melanie's bird-inflicted wounds] Yes, of course, bandages! It's terrible!
[last lines] Cathy Brenner: Can I bring the lovebirds, Mitch? they haven't harmed anyone. Mitch Brenner: Oh, alright; bring them.
