Princess Fiona: Shrek? I'm... I'm worried about Donkey, he doesn't look so good... Donkey: What you talking about? I feel fine! Princess Fiona: Well, that's what they always say, and then, and then, and then next thing you know you're on your back! [...
[eyeing the "KEEP OUT" signs surrounding Shrek's home] Donkey: I guess you don't, uh... entertain much. Shrek: I like my privacy. Donkey: Y'know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common. I hate it when you've got someone in your face, you tr...
[Shrek discovers the seven dwarves have placed Snow White on his kitchen table] Shrek: Oh, no no no no! Dead broad OFF the table! Dwarf: Well, where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken! Shrek: Huh? [rushes over to his bed to find... ] Big Bad...
[Shrek burps in front of Donkey and Fiona] The Donkey: Shrek! Shrek: What? It's a compliment. Better out than in, I always say. The Donkey: But that's no way to behave in front of a princess. [Fiona burps louder] Princess Fiona: Thanks. The Donkey: [...
Donkey: Shrek! Hold up, Shrek! You got to wait for the line! Shrek: [about to burst into the cathedral] What are you talking about? Donkey: The line, the line you gotta wait for: the priest's gonna say "Speak now or forever hold your piece", and you ...
Pinocchio: I'm not a puppet, I'm a real boy! [nose grows] Captain of Guards: Five shillings for the possessed toy. Take it away.
Donkey: ...And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases seepin' outta my butt that day!
Shrek: [to Donkey] WHY are you following me? Donkey: Oh, I'll tell you why. [starts to sing] Donkey: 'Cause I'm all alone / There's no one here beside me / My problems have all gone / There's no one to deride me! / But ya gotta have friends... Shrek:...
[Donkey keeps humming the "Duloc" song] Shrek: All right, you're going the right way for a smacked bottom. Donkey: Sorry 'bout that.
Shrek: Thank you, thank you very much. I'm here 'til Thursday. Try the veal.
Donkey: Okay, let me get this straight: you gonna go fight a dragon and rescue a princess just so Farquaad'll give you back your swamp, which you only don't have 'cause he filled it full of freaks in the first place. Is that about right? Shrek: You k...
[Shrek and Donkey are crossing a wooden bridge over a moat of lava] Donkey: Don't look down, don't look down, don't look down, keep on moving, don't look down... [a board under Donkey breaks, prompting Donkey... ] Donkey: Shrek, I'm looking down!
Shrek: Go over there and see if you can find any stairs. Donkey: Stairs? I thought we was lookin' for the Princess. Shrek: The Princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower. Donkey: How do you know that? Shrek: I read it in ...
Princess Fiona: Well, when one lives alone, one has to learns these things in case there's... [points] Princess Fiona: There's an arrow in your butt! Shrek: What? [looks at arrow] Shrek: Oh, would you look at that?
Donkey: All right, nobody move! I've got a dragon and I'm not afraid to use it! I'm a donkey on the edge!
Shrek: Fiona? Are you all right? [Fiona looks at herself, and sees she is still an ogre] Princess Fiona: Yes. But, I don't understand. I'm supposed to be beautiful. Shrek: But you are beautiful. Donkey: I was hoping this would be a happy ending... [S...
Shrek: So... what did Fiona say about me? Donkey: Ah, what're you asking me for? Why don't you go and ask her! Shrek: The wedding! We'll never make it in time! Donkey: Ha-ha-ha! Never fear! Where there's a will, there's a way. And I have a way. [blow...
Shrek: If I treat you so badly, then why did you come back, huh? Donkey: Because that's what friends do, they FORGIVE EACH OTHER! Shrek: Oh, yeah. You're right, Donkey. I forgive you - for stabbing me in the back!
