[Shrek enters the tournament] Lord Farquaad: What's that? It's hideous! Shrek: Well, that's not very nice. [looks at Donkey] Shrek: It's just a donkey.
[looking for a certain type of flower] Donkey: Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Man, this would be so much easier if I wasn't COLOR-BLIND!
Princess Fiona: Where are you going? The exit's over there! Shrek: [going to save Donkey] Well, I have to save my ass. Princess Fiona: [shocked] What kind of knight ARE you? Shrek: One of a kind.
Donkey: [looks at a hovel] Whoa. Look at that. Who'd wanna live in a place like that? Shrek: That, would be my home. Donkey: Oh... and it is LOVELY! You know, you're really quite a decorator. It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget. I...
Donkey: We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I'm making waffles!
Donkey: Hey, what's your problem, Shrek, what you got against the whole world anyway, huh? Shrek: Look, I'm not the one with the problem, okay? It's the world that seems to have a problem with ME! People take one look at me and go "Aargh! Help! Run! ...
Shrek: That'll do, Donkey. That'll do.
Princess Fiona: The sooner we get to Duloc, the better! Donkey: Oh, you gonna love it there, Princess, it's beautiful! Princess Fiona: And my groom-to-be Lord Farquaad, what's he like? Shrek: Well, let me put it this way, Princess: men of his stature...
Donkey: So where is this fire-breathin' pain in the neck, anyway? Shrek: Inside, waiting for us to rescue her. Donkey: I was talkin' about the dragon, Shrek.
Donkey: Hi, Princess! Princess Fiona: It talks! Shrek: Yeah, it's getting him to shut up that's the trick!
[Donkey thinks he's dying] The Donkey: Hey, where're you going? Oh man, I can't feel my toes! [Looks down and yelps] The Donkey: I don't have any toes! [sits down] The Donkey: I think I need a hug.
[Shrek, his swamp filled with fairytale creatures, glares at Donkey] Donkey: Hey, don't look at me, I didn't invite them! Pinocchio: Oh, gosh, no one invited us! Shrek: What? Pinocchio: We were forced to come here! Shrek: By who? Little Pig: Lord Far...
[Shrek is hit by an arrow] Princess Fiona: Oh!... oh, this is all my fault... Donkey: Why, what's wrong? Princess Fiona: Shrek's hurt! Donkey: Shrek's hurt? Shrek's HURT? Oh, no, Shrek's gonna die! Shrek: Donkey, I'm okay! Donkey: You can't do this t...
Captain of Guards: [as Donkey flies through the air on pixie dust] He can talk! Donkey: That's right, fool! Now I'm a flying talking donkey! You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkeyfly! Ha, ha! [p...
Shrek: Donkey, two things okay? Shut... up!
Princess Fiona: [hears a roar] You didn't slay the dragon? Shrek: It's on my to-do list, now come on! Princess Fiona: But this isn't right! You're meant to charge in, sword drawn, banners flying! That's what all the other knights did! Shrek: Yeah, ri...
[the dragon has eaten Lord Farquaad and spits out his crown] Donkey: Huh, celebrity marriages. They never last, do they? [receives applause from the crowd] Donkey: Good evening, people.
Donkey: You're so wrapped up in layers onion boy, you're afraid of your own feelings! Shrek: [hiding in the toilet] Go away! Donkey: See? There you are, doing it again! Just like you did to Fiona! All she ever did was like you maybe, even love you! S...
