Receptionist: Does he have Alzheimer's? David Grant: No, he just believes what people tell him. Receptionist: That's too bad.
Kate Grant: [looking at graves] There's Woody's little sister, Rose. She was only nineteen when she was killed in a car wreck near Wausa. What a whore! David Grant: Mom! Kate Grant: Nah, I liked Rose, but my God, she was a slut. David Grant: C'mon......
Kate Grant: That's Ed Pegram singing. Ed Pegram: And his momma cried, cause if there's one thing that she don't need, it's another hungry mouth to feed... in the ghetto. people don't ya understand... Kate Grant: He always did have a nice voice. It wa...
David Grant: Dad, why didn't you tell us that wasn't Ed's house? Woody Grant: I didn't know what the hell you were doing. Ross Grant: Have you ever seen us steal machinery before? Woody Grant: I never know what you boys are up to. Ross Grant: Why did...
Kate Grant: [upon learning Woody has "won" a million dollars] I never knew the son of a bitch even wanted to be a millionaire! He should have thought about that years ago and worked for it!
Kate Grant: I ain't fiddlin' with no cow titties. I'm a city girl!
David Grant: How did she die? Kate Grant: Saw herself in the mirror one day.
Woody Grant: Have a drink with your old man. Be somebody!
David Grant: ...and all your brothers are coming over today, remember? Woody Grant: Some of 'em are dead. David Grant: The dead ones won't be here.
Aunt Betty: Now Kate, we only want what's fair and what's fair is if Woody lends us back some money. Kate Grant: You can all go fuck yourselves!
Aunt Flo: Martha, where's Bart and Cole? Aunt Martha: Oh, they're off doing some volunteer work picking up trash off the streets. Kate Grant: It's community service; for Bart's rape. Aunt Martha: Sexual assault! Kate Grant: What's the difference? Aun...
Kate Grant: Why do you want meatloaf if it isn't even on the dinner menu? Woody Grant: 'cause I like it. Waitress: What can I get you? Woody Grant: Do you have any meatloaf? Waitress: No, that's only part of our lunch specials. Kate Grant: He'll have...
Kate Grant: Keith White. He wanted in my pants, too. But he was so boring. [Kate lifts her dress and flashes a tombstone] Kate Grant: See what you could have, Keith, if you hadn't talked about wheat all the time.
Aunt Martha: Ray's foot's been bothering him. Ain't that right, Ray? Uncle Ray: It's okay. Just hurts.
Receptionist: [after telling Woody he hasn't won the money] I can give you a free gift. Would you like a hat or a seat cushion? David Grant: Dad. Do you want a hat or a seat cushion? Woody Grant: I'll take a hat.
Woody Grant: So long, Albert. Uncle Albert: So long, Woody.
David Grant: So, what do you think, dad? Woody Grant: It doesn't look finished to me. David Grant: How do you mean? Woody Grant: [upon seeing Mount Rushmore] Well, it looks like somebody got bored doing it. Washington's the only one with any clothes,...
Woody Grant: I won a million dollars. ER Doctor: Congratulations, that'll just about pay for a day in the hospital.
