Perry: [Calling Harmony after escaping torture with Harry] Hey, Harmony, it's me. Harmony: Oh, God, how did you get away? Perry: I shot him with a small revolver I keep near my balls.
B-Movie Actress: So what do you do for a living? Harry: Uh, I'm retired. I invented dice when I was a kid. How about you do?
Harlan Dexter: Captain fucking Magic!
Mr. Frying Pan: Well now, here we all are. Ike, Mike and Mustard. Harry: What the hell does that mean? Mr. Fire: You know, I'm with him on this one man, that's pretty fuckin' obscure. Mr. Frying Pan: Horseshit, I hear that all the time. Mr. Fire: You...
Harry: Watch your hand. [Harry slams the door in Harmony's face]
Harry: Hey, hey, hey! It's Christmas, where's my present, Slick? Perry: Your fucking present is you're not in jail, fag-hag.
Harry: And that's how she got to the same party as me. Oh shit. I skipped something. Damn it. This whole robot bit. I made a big deal, then I like totally forgot. Fuck, this is bad narrating. Like my dad telling a joke. "Oh, wait back up. I forgot to...
Harry: Umm, clearly I'm interrupting. I feel badly. Let me... What are you drinking? Harmony: Bad. Harry: Bad? Sorry... feel...? Harmony: You feel bad. Harry: Bad? Harmony: Badly is an adverb. So to say you feel badly would be saying that the mechani...
Harry: This is every shade of wrong.
Harry: Its hard to believe it was just last Christmas that Harmony and I changed the world. And we didn't mean to and it didn't last long. You know a thing like that can't.
Harmony Age 7: I'm going to be an actress.
Bear on TV Ad: I'm for Genaro's, but then, what do I know? I'm a bear. I suck the heads off of fish.
Perry: What are you doing? Harry: I'm just trying to wrap up the movie, and leave people with a message. Perry: Oh, I've got a message for you. Get your feet off my fucking desk. Harry: Sorry. [Harry moves his feet] Harry: I work for Perry now, obvio...
Harry: [to himself] And yeah, looking back, I maybe should've said something, told her I wasn't really a nipple - DETECTIVE, detective. Uhm, sorry...
Perry: How about you, Harry, did your father love you? Harry: Ah, sometimes, you know - like when I dressed up like a bottle. How about yours? Perry: Well, he used to beat me in Morse code, so it's possible, but he never actually said the words.
Harry: So the whole... reconcilement... thing? Perry: Reconciliation, idiot.
[shortly after Mr. Frying Pan makes an obscure "Ike, Mike, and Mustard" reference] Mr. Frying Pan: You wanna know who we are? I'm the frying pan, see? And my boy over here, he's... Mr. Fire: Mustard. I'm Mustard, baby. Mr. Frying Pan: He's the fire. ...
Harry: Your mouth is a recommended place to put a sock.
