Leah: God you're getting huge. How many months has it been now? Juno MacGuff: Um it's coming up on the eighth. You should see me naked. Leah: I wish my funbags would get bigger. Juno MacGuff: Trust me, you don't. I actually have to wear a bra now and...
Juno MacGuff: No, I heard you. I just, like, don't want to give the baby to a family that describes themselves as "wholesome". Well, I don't know, I just want something a little more edgier. Leah: Okay, well what did you have in mind? Juno MacGuff: I...
Juno MacGuff: Your little girlfriend gave me the stinkeye in art class yesterday. Paulie Bleeker: Katrina's not my girlfriend alright? And I doubt she gave you the stinkeye that's just how her face looks, you know? That's just her face.
Juno MacGuff: It ended with a chair.
Juno MacGuff: Oh and you know what? I bought another Sonic Youth album and it sucked... it's just noise.
Juno MacGuff: Bleeker's mom was possibly attractive once, but now she looks like a Hobbit. You know, the fat one, that was in the Goonies.
Leah: So, are you going to go to Haven Brook or Women Now? 'Cause you know, you need a note from your parents for Haven Brook. Juno MacGuff: Yeah, I-I know. Ummm... no, I'm going to go to Women Now, just cause they help out "women now."
Vanessa Loring: What are you saying? Mark Loring: That it feels a little like bad timing. Vanessa Loring: What would be a good time for you, Mark? Mark Loring: There's just some things that I still want to do. Vanessa Loring: Like what? Be a rock sta...
Juno MacGuff: They were Mark and Vanessa Loring. And they were beautiful even in black and white.
Juno MacGuff: The funny thing is that Steve Rendazo secretly wants me. Jocks like him always want freaky girls. Girls with horn-rimmed glasses and vegan footwear and Goth makeup. Girls who play the cello and wear Converse All-Stars and want to be chi...
Juno MacGuff: So, I've been spending a lot of time listening to that weird CD you made me. Mark Loring: Oh really? What's the verdict? Juno MacGuff: I sort of like it. I mean, it's cute. Mark Loring: Cute? Juno MacGuff: Well, when you're used to the ...
Paulie Bleeker: [to Juno] Can we make out now?
Mac MacGuff: Liberty Bell, if you put one more Bac-O on that potato, I'll spank your monkey behind. Liberty Bell: [laughs]
Paulie Bleeker: Come on, let me carry your bag. Juno MacGuff: Oh, what's another ten pounds?
Rollo: You better pay for that pee-stick when you're done with it. Don't think it's yours just because you marked it with your urine!
Juno MacGuff: Oh, *wicked* pic in the PennySaver, by the way. Super classy - not like those people with the fake woods in the background. Honestly who do they think they're fooling? Vanessa Loring: You found us in the PennySaver?
Mac MacGuff: And this, of course, is Juno. Mark Loring: Like the city in Alaska? Juno MacGuff: No. Mark Loring: No? Hon, shall we sit down and get to know one another? Vanessa Loring: Oh, I thought I would get some drinks. What would anyone like? I h...
Mac MacGuff: Liberty Bell, if you put one more Baco on that potato, I'm gonna kick your little monkey butt.