Harry: [sitting outside the McCallister house] I don't get it. I mean right now it looks like there's nobody home. Last night the place was jumping. Something ain't right. Harry: [to Marv] Harry: Go check it out. Marv: [Stares blankly] Now? Harry: No...
Kevin McCallister: So give it a shot, for your granddaughter anyway. I'm sure she misses you and the presents. Marley: I send her a check. Kevin McCallister: I wish my grandparents did that. They always send me clothes. Last year I got a sweater with...
Harry: [Barges through the kitchen door after his head is blow-torched] Where are you, you little CREEP?
Kevin McCallister: Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen.
Marv: [shouting after stepping on ornaments] I'm gonna kill that kid!
Officer Devereux: Hey, you know we've been looking for you two guys for a long time. You guys are always leaving the water running whenever you break in, now we know each and every house you guys have hit. Marv: Yeah. But remember, we're the wet band...
Harry: You bomb me with one more can, kid, and I'll snap off your cajones and boil them in motor oil!
Marley: You live down the street from me right?, You know anytime you see you can always say hello, you don't have to be afraid. A lot of stuff has been said about me, none of it's true.
Marv: Out the window? [Harry starts climbing out onto a zip line] Marv: I'm not going out the window! Harry: What're you scared, Marv? Are you afraid? C'mon, get out here. Marv: [Marv follows Harry and they start across the rope] Ohhh, let's go back....
[the check-out woman holds up a bag full of army men, and gives Kevin a funny look] Kevin McCallister: For the kids.
Kate McCallister: [to the Scranton ticket agent] This is *Christmas*! The season of perpetual hope! And I don't care if I have to get out on your runway and hitchhike! If it costs me everything I own, if I have to sell my soul to the devil himself, I...
Kevin McCallister: I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices; including inbetween my toes and in my belly button, which I never did before but sort of enjoyed. I washed my hair with adult formula shampo...
Mitch Murphy: Hi, I'm Mitch Murphy. I live across the street. You guys going out of town? We're going to Orlando, Florida. Well, actually, first we're going to Missouri to pick up my grandma. Did you know the McCallisters are going to France? Do you ...
Kate McCallister: Where are the passports and tickets? Peter McCallister: I put them in the microwave to dry em' off.
Kevin McCallister: I don't know how to pack a suit case. I've never done this once in my whole life. Jeff McCallister: Tough. Kevin McCallister: That's what Megan said. Megan McCallister: What did I say? Jeff McCallister: You told Kevin "tough". Mega...
Kevin McCallister: Mom, Uncle Frank won't let me watch the movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I? Kate McCallister: Kevin, I'm on the phone. Kevin McCallister: It's not even rated R. He's just being a jerk. Kate McCallister: Kevin, if Uncle Frank ...
Kate McCallister: [about Kevin] He was in the garage again playing with the glue gun. Peter McCallister: Didn't we talk about that? Kevin McCallister: Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so. I was making ornaments out of fish hooks. Peter McCall...
Leslie McCallister: Peter, Kate, do you guys have a voltage adapter? Peter McCallister: [hands her Kevin] Here, here's a voltage adapter. Leslie McCallister: My, but you're getting heavy. Go pack your suit case. Kevin McCallister: [stares in horror] ...
