[Harold and Sunshine are laying on the floor covered in fake blood from Harold's knife] Mrs. Chasen: [shocked] Harold!... That was your last date!
Maude: Consistency is not *really* a human trait.
Maude: [observing trash sorting operation] I ask you though Harold, is it enough?
Harold: [non-sequitur to hawkish uncle] During war time, the national suicide rate goes down.
Mrs. Chasen: She provides the *whole* southwest with chicken feed!
