Reggie Lampert: Is there a Mrs. Cruikshank...? Adam Canfield: Yes. Reggie Lampert: But you're divorced. Adam Canfield: No... Reggie Lampert: [Regina's face falls] Oh. Adam Canfield: [Brian/Adam gets out his wallet to show her the picture] My mother, ...
Reggie Lampert: Of course, you won't be able to lie on your back for a while but then you can lie from any position, can't you?
Reggie Lampert: You're blocking my view. Peter Joshua: Ohh... which view would you prefer? Reggie Lampert: The one you're blocking.
Peter Joshua: [opening the phone booth to see Regina] [Regina screams] Peter Joshua: What are you doing in here? Reggie Lampert: I'm having a nervous breakdown.
Reggie Lampert: Well, wasn't it Shakespeare that said, "When strangers do meet in far off lands, they should e'er long see each other again"? Peter Joshua: Shakespeare never said that! Reggie Lampert: How do you know? Peter Joshua: It's terrible. You...
Alexander Dyle: What do I have to do to satisfy you? Become the next victim? Reggie Lampert: That's a start anyway.
Alexander Dyle: All right, get set for the story of my life. Reggie Lampert: Fiction or non-fiction?
Peter Joshua: Do we know each other? Reggie Lampert: Why, do you think we're going to? Peter Joshua: How would I know? Reggie Lampert: Because I already know an awful lot of people, so until one of them dies I couldn't possibly meet anyone else. Pete...
[Touching the cleft in his chin] Reggie Lampert: How do you shave in there?
Reggie Lampert: So it's goodbye Alexander Dyle and welcome home Peter Joshua. Adam Canfield: [shakes his head] Sorry the name is Adam Canfield. Reggie Lampert: Adam Canfield? Wonderful! Do you realize you've had three names in the past two days? I do...
Adam Canfield: Well, what did you expect me to say? That a pretty girl with an outrageous manner means more to an old pro like me than a quarter of a million dollars? Reggie Lampert: I don't suppose so. Adam Canfield: Well, it's a toss-up, I can tell...
[Gideon is looking at Charles' body in the coffin and begins to sneeze violently] Sylvie Gaudel: He must've known Charles pretty well. Reggie Lampert: How can you tell? Sylvie Gaudel: He's allergic to him.
Sylvie: It is infuriating that your unhappiness does not turn to fat!
Reggie Lampert: I'm in the book. Peter Joshua: Are you? Reggie Lampert: Charles is. Peter Joshua: Is there only one Charles Lampert? Reggie Lampert: Lord I hope so!
Peter Joshua: How about making me vice president in charge of cheering you up?
[Tearing filter off cigarette] Reggie Lampert: I can't stand these things... it's like drinking coffee through a veil.
Reggie Lampert: Do you know what's wrong with you? Peter Joshua: No, what? Reggie Lampert: Nothing!
Inspector Grandpierre: We use the guillotine in this country. I have always imagined that the blade, coming down, causes no more than a slight tickling sensation on the back of the neck. It is only a guess, of course. I hope none of you ever finds ou...
