It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.
W. C. FieldsI always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FieldsThe laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. FieldsSome things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FieldsI like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields