Life Quotes

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.

W. C. Fields

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

W. C. Fields

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.

W. C. Fields

Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.

W. C. Fields

There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it.

W. C. Fields

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.

W. C. Fields

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.

W. C. Fields

I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.

W. C. Fields

I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

W. C. Fields

The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.

W. C. Fields

I never met a kid I liked.

W. C. Fields

If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.

W. C. Fields

I must have a drink of breakfast.

W. C. Fields

Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.

W. C. Fields

I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

W. C. Fields

I drink therefore I am.

W. C. Fields

I have personally seen statements that were longer than some books I have read.

Wendell H. Ford

I never threw the spitter, well maybe once or twice when I really needed to get a guy out real bad.

Whitey Ford

Sooner or later the arm goes bad. It has to... Sooner or later you have to start pitching in pain.

Whitey Ford

You kind of took it for granted around the Yankees that there was always going to be baseball in October.

Whitey Ford

There's no easier pitch to hit than a splitter that doesn't do anything.

Whitey Ford