I lost my mother when I was 7 and they put her in a mental hospital. My brother and I watched her being taken away in a strait jacket. That's something you never forget. And my stepmother was like in the movie 'Precious.' I couldn't handle it. So I s...
Nephew: I don't wanna play baseball no more. Huey Lucas: [enters back patio] Frank, we got a problem. Frank Lucas: [looks at his brother then looks back at his nephew] Well, what do you want? Nephew: I want what you got Uncle Frank. Nephew: I wanna b...
[first lines] Christy: [voiceover] There's some things you should wish for and some things you shouldn't. That's what my little brother Frankie told me. He told me I only had three wishes, and I looked into his eyes, and I don't know why I believed h...
Jake: How are you gonna get the band back together, Mr. Hot Rodder? Those cops have your name, your address... Elwood: They don't have my address. I falsified my renewal. I put down 1060 West Addison. Jake: 1060 West Addison? That's Wrigley Field.
Murph: Tell me a little about this electric piano, Ray. Ray: Ah, you have a good eye, my man. That's the best in the city Chicago. Jake: How much? Ray: 2000 bucks and it's yours. You can take it home with you. As a matter of fact, I'll throw in the b...
[Trying to get Mr. Fabulous back into the band] Jake: If you say no, Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day of the week. [Elwood takes a huge, obnoxious bite out of his bread] Mr. Fabulous: Okay, okay. I'll play. You g...
SWAT Team Commander: Excuse me! Did you see two guys come through here, black suits, black hats, one carrying a briefcase? Lobby Guard #1: Yeah! I just sent 'em down there. SWAT Team Commander: Thank you! [hundreds of cops continues charge]
[Furious has shot at a burglar] Furious: Somebody must have been praying for that fool, cause I swear I aimed right for his head. Tre Age 10: You should have blew it off. Furious Styles: Don't say that. Don't say that. Just would've contributed to th...
New Labour leader Ed Miliband announces plan to 'make this party slightly less unelectable by 2015'. He added: 'I am Ed, the Almighty One.' Defeated brother David Miliband overheard muttering: 'Now I know how Wayne Christ felt after little Jesus came...
My youngest brother and I went on a ten-day canoe trip in Bowron Provincial Park in British Columbia years ago. Believe it or not, we took only granola, thinking we'd be eating a lot of lake trout. Well, we neglected to bring along a net, and our fis...
During his time with the French army, years before, one of the sergeants had explained to the younger mercenaries the trick of falling asleep the night before a battle. "Make yourself comfortable, examine your conscience, and make a good Act of Contr...
Andy Dufresne: 'That's the beauty of music. They can't get that from you...haven't you ever felt that way about music?' Red: 'I played a mean harmonica as a younger man. Lost interest in it though. Didn't make much sense in here.' Andy: 'Here's where...
I want to see her naked, " Mengele said pointing to Marlene. She cried and shock. My mother flung her body in front of Marlene's and said, "You can't have her. I love her, my daughter." My father said, "Take the younger one. She's smarter, " as he pu...
On my list of things to be when I grew up was a character in a Gary Larson comic. With one of his books in my hands, I would spend hours and hours laughing. And then I’d finally stop laughing long enough to actually open the book. I’m not sure wh...
Mr. Gweta looked ten years younger than Professor Khupe had expected. His jet-black hair was trimmed so neatly that it would make a manicured golf course look scruffy. His face was exceptionally smooth, giving the impression that he had been born wit...
I know, now, without a doubt that the true source of happiness, self-worth, and authentic beauty doesn't come from the outside. Women are constantly being persuaded to want something unachievable, to look younger or thinner and above all to fit in be...
Many of the younger generation know my name in a vague way and connect it with grotesque inventions, but don't believe that I ever existed as a person. They think I am a nonperson, just a name that signifies a tangled web of pipes or wires or strings...
The young are right if they have little confidence in the ideas which rule most of their elders. But they are mistaken or misled when they believe that these are still the liberal ideas of the nineteenth century, which, in fact, the younger generatio...
Suddenly I realized that I wanted everything to be as it was when I was younger. When you're young enough, you don't know that you live in a cheap lousy apartment. A cracked chair is nothing other than a chair. A dandelion growing out of a crack in t...
Orlando had a Pinto, a car that hadn't been in existence for thirty-plus years. He still hadn't figured out why a strong, strapping werewolf would want one. Orlando said it was because he'd customized it. Painted pink with purple stripes, the younger...
