[as they all observe the subway station] Ajax: Come on, what kind of chickenshit crap is this. Cochise: Yeah, come on? We're here, what are we waiting for? Fox: The train would help! Unless you wanna go up there and get jacked on an open platform. Co...
R.K. Maroon: [Pulls a gun on Eddie] Let me see that will. Eddie Valiant: I told you, I got it. R.K. Maroon: I wanna see it now! [Grabs the will from Eddie's coat and reads it] R.K. Maroon: "How do I love thee, let me count the ways"? Is this supposed...
Jessica Rabbit: Uh-oh. It's the weasels! This way. We'll take Gingerbread Lane. Eddie Valiant: No, no! Gingerbread Lane's this way! [Points with his thumb; suddenly, Benny the Cab appears in front of them] Benny the Cab: So, Valiant, you call a cab o...
Harry Burns: We're talking dream date compared to my horror. It started out fine, she's a very nice person, and we're sitting and we're talking at this Ethiopian restaurant that she wanted to go to. And I was making jokes, you know like, "Hey I didn'...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
Dan Dreiberg: So I've been thinking, I feel we have an obligation to our fraternity... I think we oughta spring Rorshach. Laurie Juspeczyk: What? Dan Dreiberg: Someone set him up. This whole cancer thing with Jon, it just doesn't make sense. You didn...
[Book, having just dropped off Rachel and Samuel back at Lapp's farm, is driving away when he convulses and passes out from loss of blood from an untreated gunshot wound and crashes into a birdhouse. Rachel and Samuel run out to Book] Rachel Lapp: My...
Robert Graysmith: This is a case that's covered both northern and southern California with victims and suspects spread over hundreds of miles, would you agree? Dave Toschi: Yeah. Robert Graysmith: Darlene Ferrin worked at the Vallejo House of Pancake...
Robert Graysmith: Dave, he made a mistake! The birthday was the one time that he was weak, the one time he gave something away! Dave Toschi: Robert... Robert Graysmith: It's Arthur Leigh Allen! Dave Toschi: Where did you get that name? Robert Graysmi...
Lieutenant John Chard: Mr. Bourne, there should be 12 more men working on this redoubt. Color Sgt. Bourne: They're very tired, sir. [Chard whirls around] Lieutenant John Chard: I don't give a damn! And I want this wall nine feet high, firing steps on...
C.I.A. Director: What's this - this cluster of buildings down here? George: The PMA - it's the Pakistani Military Academy. C.I.A. Director: [looks at him incredulously] George: It's their West Point. C.I.A. Director: And how close is it to the house?...
Lord Naritsugu Matsudaira: Hanbei? Hanbei Kitou: Huh? Lord Naritsugu Matsudaira: You think the age of war was like this? Hanbei Kitou: Perhaps Lord Naritsugu Matsudaira: It's magnificent. With death comes gratitude for life. If a man has lived in vai...
Solomon Northup: [Epps has just whipped Patsey within an inch of her life] Thou devil! Sooner or later, somewhere in the course of eternal justice thou shalt answer for this sin! Edwin Epps: No sin! There is no sin! A man does how he pleases with his...
Patroller: [in a vain attempt to escape, Solomon runs into some patrollers who are fixing to hang a trio of slaves] Boy, where are you going? Solomon Northup: To the store, Sir, to Bartholomew's. I was sent there by Mistress Epps. Patroller: [the pat...
King Leonidas: Spartans! Prepare for glory! Daxos: Glory? Have you gone mad? There is no glory to be had now! Only retreat, or surrender or death! King Leonidas: Well, that's an easy choice for us, Arcadian! Spartans never retreat! Spartans never sur...
King Leonidas: [on being told the Persians are coming to parley] Captain, I leave you in charge. Captain: But, sire... King Leonidas: Relax, old friend. If they assassinate me, all of Sparta goes to war. Pray they're that stupid. Pray we're that luck...
Messenger: All that God-King Xerxes requires is this: a simple offering of earth and water. A token of Sparta's submission to the will of Xerxes. King Leonidas: Submission? Well that's a bit of a problem. See, rumor has it the Athenians have already ...
Marilyn Lovell: Jeffrey? Jeffrey Lovell: Why are so many people here? Marilyn Lovell: Well, you know, your dad's flying his mission. Jeffrey Lovell: He said he was going to get me a moon rock. Marilyn Lovell: Right. Well, something broke on your dadd...
Felicia: [in sweet voice] Mummy, maybe a trip to the outback will help me get over this little... phase I'm going through. And you never know, I might meet some lovely country girl. [in tough voice] Felicia: I hereby christen this budget Barbie campe...
Tick: Well, listen to this one. After we did the ABBA show, Kevin had one of those liposuction penis enlargements. Felicia: He didn't? Tick: Yep. Do you know what they do? They siphon all the fat out of your love handles, and actually inject it into ...
Dick Liddil: Did you cook this, ma'am? Sarah Hite: I've got a nigga woman. Major George Hite: [short of hearing] How's that? Sarah Hite: [louder and slower] Dick asked if I cooked this! Major George Hite: Did ya? Sarah Hite: ...No! Wood Hite: [whispe...
