Mr. Bingley: I've never seen so many pretty girls in my life! Mr. Darcy: You are dancing with the only handsome girl in the room. Mr. Bingley: She is the most beautiful creature I have ever beheld. But her sister Elizabeth is very agreeable. Mr. Darc...
Lorenzo St. DuBois: [singing] And I give a flower to the big fat cop / He takes his club and he beats me up / I give a flower to the garbage man / He stuffs my girl in the garbage can / And I give it to the landlord when the rent comes 'round / He th...
Hrundi V. Bakshi: What is this game you call to get the brightly colored balls in the hole? 'Wyoming Bill' Kelso: Pool. Hrundi V. Bakshi: POO? 'Wyoming Bill' Kelso: Not poo! POOL! Hrundi V. Bakshi: Oh, POOO-EL! 'Wyoming Bill' Kelso: That's right! Hru...
[Dexter has just proposed] Tracy Lord: Oh Dexter you're not doing it just to soften the blow? C. K. Dexter Haven: No. Tracy Lord: Nor to save my face? C. K. Dexter Haven: Oh, it's a nice little face. Tracy Lord: Oh Dexter, I'll be yar now, I promise ...
Charlie: Mr. Anderson? Can I ask you something? Bill: Yeah. Charlie: Why do nice people choose the wrong people to date? Bill: Are we talking about anyone specific? [Charlie nods] Bill: Well, we accept the love we think we deserve. Charlie: Can we ma...
Sam: So, I'm guessing you've never been high before. Charlie: No. No, no, no. My best friend, Michael, his dad was a big drinker, so he hated all that stuff. Parties too. Sam: Well, where is Michael tonight? Charlie: Oh, he shot himself last May. I k...
Patrick: I'll tell you Sam, this one is tough. I have received a harmonica, a magnetic poetry set, a book about Harvey Milk, and a mix tape with the song Asleep on it twice. I mean, I have no idea. This collection of presents is so gay that I think I...
Dodge Landon: Take your stinking paws off me you damn dirty ape! Caesar: NO! Rodney: [looks at Caesar while he pulls the tranq-gun back and softly] Oh, my God. Buck: [looks at Caesar and softly] Oh-oh-oh. Caesar: [grunts and looks at the other apes w...
[ED-209 has malfunctioned during a demonstration, killing Kinney in the boardroom] The Old Man: Dick, I'm very disappointed. Dick Jones: I'm sure it's only a glitch, a temporary setback. The Old Man: [raises his voice in anger] You call this a GLITCH...
Mr. Brown: [after Joe assigns names] Yeah, yeah, but "Mr. Brown"? That's little too close to "Mr. Shit". Mr. Pink: Yeah, "Mr. Pink" sounds like "Mr. Pussy". Tell you what, let me be Mr. Purple. That sounds good to me. I'm Mr. Purple. Joe: You're *not...
Nice Guy Eddie: What happened to Brown and Blue? Mr. Pink: Brown's dead. We dont know what happened to Blue. Nice Guy Eddie: Brown's dead? Are you sure? Mr. White: Im sure. I was there. He took one in the head. Nice Guy Eddie: Nobody's got a clue wha...
[Rudy sneaks into Notre Dame Stadium] Fortune: Hey kid! You're not supposed to be here! Rudy: Hey this place is really somethin else huh? Someday I'm gonna come out of that tunnel and I'm gonna run onto this field Fortune: Well it ain't gonna be this...
Blofeld: Three men were found dead on the Orient Express train at Trieste. One of them was Grant. What have you got to say about that Number Five? Kronsteen: It was Klebb's choice. Her people failed. Rosa Klebb: It was your plan they followed implici...
Charlie: Ray, all airlines have crashed at one time or another, that doesn't mean that they are not safe. Raymond: QANTAS. QANTAS never crashed. Charlie: QANTAS? Raymond: Never crashed. Charlie: Oh that's gonna do me a lot of good because QANTAS does...
[first lines] Melanie: New patient? New Dental Patient: Yes, I was referred by my lawyer about veneers. [big grin] Melanie: You're a new patient, that's all I need to know. Fill this out so we know who to contact in case we loose you in the chair. Ne...
Alan Johnson: [Leaving Angela's office] You OK? Charlie Fineman: Yeah. Just make sure they never schedule me near that girl, all right? I would... No, it's just I never wanna see her again. That's trouble. She's too good-looking. I just... Nobody has...
Suzy Miller: He only wanted to show me his pride and joy. Rhymes with "boy", if you ask me. And "toy". God, it's so flimsy, for something that costs so much. There's no comfort, no protection, nothing. James Hunt: No, it's just a little coffin, reall...
Chuck Yeager: Hey, Ridley, make another note here, would ya? Must be something wrong with this ol' Mach meter. Jumped plumb off the scale. Gone kinda screwy on me. Jack Ridley: You go ahead and bust it, we'll fix it. Personally, I think you're seein'...
[in a letter to Max] Dirk Calloway: Dear Max, I am sorry to say that I have secretly found out that Mr. Blume is having an affair with Miss Cross. My first suspicions came when I saw them Frenching in front of our house. And then I knew for sure when...
[During a war game with BB guns] Royal: [on top of a roof, aiming at Chas] Hold it Chassie. Hold it right there. Young Chas Tenenbaum: What are you doing? You're on my team! Royal: Ha-ha! There are no teams! [he shoots at Chas, hitting his hand. Chas...
Della Bea Robinson: I'm having second thoughts about this. I don't know nobody in L.A. Ray Charles: Look, Bea, I don't want my kids growing up in the South. Now L.A. is where, you know, a Negro can spread his wings and fly. Della Bea Robinson: Ray, m...
