Johnny Hooker: Hey, where's June? Loretta: She quit. I'm filling in for a couple of days, till I can get a train outta here. Johnny Hooker: Yeah? Where ya going? Loretta: I don't know. Depends on which train I get on.
Gaila: Jim, I think I love you. James T. Kirk: That is so weird. Gaila: Lights. Computer: Lights on. Gaila: Did you just say, "That is so weird"? James T. Kirk: Yeah, I did, but...
[Finishing his "Kyle's Mom" song] Cartman: Kyle's Mom... She's a big, fat, fuckin' BIIIIIIIIITCH! Who's a fuckin' bitch? Kyle's Mooooooooom! Yeah! [Notices Kyle's mom standing behind him] Cartman: Oh fuck.
The Mole: You MUST shut of the alarms! I fucking hate guard dogs! Cartman: Yeah, I heard you the first time you British piece of shit. [gets shocked by the V-chip] Cartman: Owww!
Taylor's Father: [after Toby and Taylor are caught making out in a diner] You better watch him before he gets some poor innocent girl in trouble! Bree Osbourne: Yeah, well make sure she doesn't ruin some poor innocent boy's life!
David St. Hubbins: Can you play a bass line like Nigel used to on "Big Bottom"? Can you double that? You might recall the line's in fifths. Viv Savage: Oh yeah, I've got two hands here.
Alex Goran: What a weasly prick. Natalie Keener: Yeah, but what does that make me? Someone who falls for a prick. Alex Goran: We all fall for the prick. Pricks are spontaneous, they're unpredictable and they're fun. And then we're surprised when they...
V: [as "The Count of Monte Cristo" ends] Did you like it? Evey Hammond: Yeah. But it made me feel sorry for Mercedes. V: Why? Evey Hammond: Because he cared more about revenge than he did about her.
Vivian Cash: Your mama was here. Your daddy too. Johnny Cash: Oh yeah. And what'd he say? Vivian Cash: He said now you won't have to work so hard to make people think you've been in jail.
Roger Rabbit: Yeah. Check the probate. Why, my Uncle Thumper had a problem with HIS probate, and he had to take these big pills, and drink lots of water. Eddie Valiant: Not prostate, you idiot, PROBATE!
Jordan Belfort: My wife, Naomi, the Duchess of Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. A former model and Miller Lite girl. Yeah. She was the one with my cock in her mouth in the Ferrari, so put your dick back in your pants.
Out of all the ridiculous religion stories - which are greatly, wonderfully ridiculous - the silliest one I've ever heard is, 'Yeah, there's this big, giant universe, and it's expanding, and it's all going to collapse on itself, and we're all just he...
Yeah, I think it motivates you as people start to count you out. It doesn't make you play any harder, because every time you go out on the field you give 110 percent, but it does give you more of an edge mentally, knowing that you were in the same si...
My guiltiest pleasure? 'Untamed & Uncut'. Videos of people being attacked by animals. Yeah. I don't know why. I just love seeing guys who say, 'I'm gonna stick my hand in that crocodile's mouth and see what happens.' And then it snaps down on them. T...
Selena: What's up? Jim: Nothin'. Got a headache. Selena: Bad? Jim: Yeah, it's pretty bad. Selena: Well, why didn't you say anything before? Jim: Well, because I didn't think you'd give a shit.
Tom: [split screen scene on the train about Millie's wedding] Yeah but you said you were going that's why I'm going. McKenzie: And that's why I called her last night and told her I was sick, like a ninja.
[Bud is being put into the fluid-breathing suit] Virgil: So, I can hear you, but I can't talk, right? Ensign Monk: The fluid prevents the larynx from making sound. Excuse me. It'll feel a little strange. Virgil: Yeah, no shit.
Mortimer Brewster: [introducing Teddy to Gilchrist] Oh, uh, Mr. President, may I have the pleasure of introducing... Teddy Brewster: Dr. Livingstone! Dr. Gilchrist: Livingstone? Mortimer Brewster: Yeah, well, that's what he presumes.
John Chambers: [after hearing of the plan to get the hostages out] So you want to come to Hollywood, act like a big shot... Tony Mendez: Yeah. John Chambers: ...without actually doing anything? Tony Mendez: No. John Chambers: [smiles] You'll fit righ...
Dan: Don't you know anything about your father? Violet: Yeah. Dan: What? Violet: I do. I know what mom says. Dan: What does mom say? Violet: She says you're a pathetic loser. Dan: She says that affectionately.
Susan Vance: Now that's all perfectly clear, isn't it? Dr. Fritz Lehman: Yeah-No it *isn't* ! You see - she's going to give me an explanation... David Huxley: No no no and my dear sir, it never *will* be clear, as long as she's explaining it!
