Sally Albright: You know, I'm so glad I never got involved with you. I just would have ended up being some woman you had to get up out of bed and leave at 3:00 in the morning and go clean your andirons, and you don't even have a fireplace, not that I...
Sale House Woman #4: The ad said this pool was lagoon-like. There's nothing lagoon-like about it, except for the bugs. There aren't even any plants out here! Carolyn Burnham: What do you call this? Is this not a plant? If you have a problem with my p...
John Milner: What the hell's goin' on here, Toad? Hey, man, are you all right? Terry Fields: Yeah, I'll die soon, then it'll all be over, John. Debbie Dunham: Wow, you're just like the Lone Ranger. John Milner: Yeah, yeah. Listen, are you with him? T...
Amélie: [whispering in cinema] I like to look for things no one else catches. [film on the cinema screen: as a man and a woman are about to kiss, a fly walks across a windowpane in the background] Amélie: I hate the way drivers never look at the ro...
Elwood: [during "Everybody Needs Somebody to Love"] People, when you do find that special somebody, you gotta hold that man, hold that woman! Love him, please him, squeeze her, please her! Signify your feelings with every gentle caress, because it's ...
Francesca: I had thoughts about him I hardly knew what to do with, and he read every one. Whatever I wanted, he gave himself up to, and in that moment everything I knew to be true about myself was gone. I was acting like another woman, yet I was more...
Bunny Lebowski: I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollars. Brandt: Ah hahahahaha! Wonderful woman. We're all, we're all very fond of her. Very free-spirited. Bunny Lebowski: Brandt can't watch, though, or he has to pay a hundred. Brandt: Ah haha. Th...
Jack Twist: Ever notice how a woman'll powder her nose before a party starts, and the powder it again when the party's over? Why powder your nose just to go home to bed? Randall Malone: Don't know. Even if I wanted to know, couldn't get a word in wit...
It's sad if people think that's (homemaking) a dull existance, [but] you can't just buy an apartment and furnish it and walk away. It's the flowers you choose, the music you play, the smile you have waiting. I want it to be gay and cheerful, a haven ...
Mrs. Landingham, does the President have free time this morning? The President has nothing but free time, Toby. Right now he's in the residence eating Cheerios and enjoying Regis and Kathie Lee. Should I get him for you? Sarcasm's a disturbing thing ...
I have always believed that if you need to take your clothes off to get your man, you've begun to lose the battle. If you pull it off right, you can do it in a very classy way... Being sexy is about suggestion; it's about the tease. It's not about be...
Not enough youths fighting windmills. And the old are fearful, jaded or dead. Do not ask me what to do. I am just as cowardly as you. And do not tell me it is enough to speak the truth; that it is bravery enough. Every mountain leveled to the ground,...
I'm in love with a girl who knows me better. Fell for the woman just when I met her. Took my sweet time when I was bitter. Someone understands, She knows how treat a fella right. Give me that feeling every night, She wants show love when I wanna figh...
Something about the turbulence of adolescence makes you want to do something creative...I thought as I got older I would stop writing about it, but I find adolescence, and popular depictions of it, very interesting. I like to see where my own life in...
It is a very beautiful day. The woman looks around and thinks: 'there cannot ever have been a spring more beautiful than this. I did not know until now that clouds could be like this. I did not know that the sky is the sea and that clouds are the sou...
Flinging himself from his horse, he made, in his rage, as if he would breast the flood. Standing knee-deep in water he hurled at the faithless woman all the insults that have ever been the lot of her sex. Faithless, mutable, fickle, he called her; de...
Churchill: "Madam, would you sleep with me for five million pounds?" Socialite: "My goodness, Mr. Churchill... Well, I suppose... we would have to discuss terms, of course... " Churchill: "Would you sleep with me for five pounds?" Socialite: "Mr. Chu...
My dear friend! what is there extraordinary in that? They are all in love with some other man. Who gets the first of a woman’s heart? In all my experience I have never yet met with the man who was Number One. Number Two, sometimes. Number Three, Fo...
Remember Stalingrad. Remember the crash of 1929. Remember the Industrial Revolution. Now remember that I am the proletariat cog in the machine that causes the meltdown of the aristocratic assembly line. Ben Franklin was a man of vision. Ben wore bifo...
He trailed off as his watery blue gaze fell on Sailor. "And who's this strapping fellow?" "My... fiancé." I put my arm through Sailor's. He looked down at me, aghast at the suggestion of intimacy. "Well, that's some woman you've got there, young man...
Having her in my arms feels like coming home. I am not one to believe in all that love at first sight bullshit, but even as cynical as I am, I can recognize something bigger than lust at work. My body wants her; that is no secret, but the level of wa...
