Tell me what you do with the food you eat, and I'll tell you who you are. Some turn their food into fat and manure, some into work and good humor, and others, I'm told, into God. So there must be three sorts of men. I'm not one of the worst, boss, no...
You think I don’t know pain?” Puck shook his head at me. “Or loss? I’ve been around a lot longer than you, prince! I know what love is, and I’ve lost my fair share, too. Just because we have a different way of handling it, doesn’t mean I ...
Brick Pollitt: Why'd you let Mama buy all this stuff? Harvey 'Big Daddy' Pollitt: The human animal is a beast that must die. If he's got money, he buys and buys and buys everything he can, in the crazy hope one of those things will be life-everlastin...
Nick Fury: Why make me head of SHIELD? Alexander Pierce: Because you're the best. And the most ruthless person I ever met. Nick Fury: I did what I did to protect people. Alexander Pierce: Our enemies are your enemies, Nick. Disorder, war. It's just a...
Mrs. X: Henry, may I speak to you a minute? Over here. Did you and Mary have sexual intercourse? Henry Spencer: [stammering] Why? Mrs. X: Did you? Henry Spencer: Why are you asking me this question? Mrs. X: I have a very good reason, and now I want y...
Rebecca: Oh! It's that comedian I was telling you about. [she turns up the volume on her television, which is showing an odd-looking man performing stand-up comedy] Rebecca: See this bit, it's the absolute worst. Joey McCobb, the Stand Up Comic: [on ...
Mr. Arthur Weasley: Harry, there are some within the Ministry who would strongly discourage me from divulging what I'm about to reveal to you, but I think that you need to know the facts. You are in danger. Grave danger. Harry: Has this anything to d...
Samantha: So how can I help you? Theodore: Oh, it's just more that everything feels disorganized, that's all. Samantha: You mind if I look through your hard drive? Theodore: Um... okay. Samantha: Okay, let's start with your e-mails. You have a severa...
Bill: He'll accept you as his student. The Bride: Caught him in a good mood, aye? Bill: More like a sadistic one. Just seeing those steps again makes me ache. You're gonna have plenty of fun carrying buckets of water up and down that fucker. The Brid...
Yao: [at the waterhole] Hey, Ping. Mulan: Oh, hi, guys. I didn't know you were here. I was just washing, so now I'm clean, and I'm gonna go. Bye-bye! Ling: Come back here! I knew we were jerks to you before, so, let's start over. Hi, I'm Ling. Chien-...
Chico: Villages like this they make up a song about every big thing that happens. Sing them for years. Chris Adams: You think it's worth it? Chico: Don't you? Chris Adams: It's only a matter of knowing how to shoot a gun. Nothing big about that. Chic...
Pernell: [during a visit to the penitentiary] It's been a long time, Caine. How you doin', man? How come you never come see me? Caine: [looking down] Man, I don't want to see you all caged up like some animal. Pernell: Is that what you think? I'm a a...
Ed, the car salesman: I'll get to the bottom of this. Davenport! Davenport: Yes, Mr. Ed? Ed, the car salesman: Mr. Griswold ordered a blue sports wagon, where is it? Davenport: I don't know sir. Ed, the car salesman: [to Clark] I know what must have ...
Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars? Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time, man. Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time? Lawrence: Damn st...
Han Solo: Hey, Your Worship, I'm only trying to help. Princess Leia: Would you please stop calling me that? Han Solo: Sure, Leia. Princess Leia: You make it so difficult sometimes. Han Solo: I do, I really do. You could be a little nicer, though. Com...
Captain Hadley: So this big shot lawyer calls me long distance from Texas. I say "Yeah?" He says, "Sorry to inform you, but your brother just died." Guard Mert: Oh damn, Byron, I'm sorry to hear that. Captain Hadley: I'm not, he was an asshole. Ran o...
Sammy Barnathan: I don't have a resume, or a picture. I've never worked as an actor. Caden Cotard: Good. Tell me why you're here. Sammy Barnathan: Well I've been... I've been following you for twenty years. So I knew about this audition because I fol...
Eli Sunday: You are a stupid man, Abel. You've let someone come in here and walk all over us. You let him in and do his work here, and you are a stupid man for what we could have had. Abel Sunday: I followed His word, Eli. I tried. Eli Sunday: You di...
Truman: I figure we can scrape together $8,000... Meryl: Every time you and Marlon get together... Truman: We can bum around the world for a year on that! Meryl: And then what, Truman? We'd be where we were five years ago. You're talking like a teena...
Verbal: [referring to Rabin] That guy is tense. Tension is a killer. I used to be in a barbershop quartet in Skokie, Illinois. The baritone was this guy named Kip Diskin, big fat guy, I mean, like, orca fat. He was so stressed in the morning... Dave ...
[Judge Doom about to "dip" Roger] Eddie Valiant: Hey, Judge. Doesn't a dying rabbit deserve a last request? Roger Rabbit: Yeah, nose plugs would be nice. Eddie Valiant: I think you want a drink. So, how about it, Judge? Judge Doom: Well, why not? I d...