Humphrey: So, just listen. Now, did I or did I not... do... vaginal... juices? Pupils: Mmm. Mmm. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Humphrey: Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson. Watson: R - rubbing the clitoris, sir? Humphrey: What's wrong with a kiss, b...
John Anderton: [about Witwer's father] What does he think about your chosen line of work? Danny Witwer: I don't know. He was shot and killed when I was 15 on the steps of our church in Dublin. I know what it's like to lose someone close, John. 'Cours...
Tank: Here you go, buddy; "Breakfast of Champions." Mouse: If you close your eyes, it almost feels like you're eating runny eggs. Apoc: Yeah, or a bowl of snot. Mouse: Do you know what it really reminds me of? Tasty Wheat. Did you ever eat Tasty Whea...
Vinny Gambini: [answering the phone] Hello? D.A. Jim Trotter: [into the phone] You did good out there today, Yankee. I like the competition. You like competition, too? Makes things kinds fun, doesn't it? Vinny Gambini: I'm enjoying myself so far. D.A...
Clarissa Saunders: How many times have you heard me say "I'm fed up with politics" and I... no, I let him talk me into staying. Secretary to a leader of little squirts! Why? Because I need the job and a new suit of clothes! Diz Moore: Would you settl...
Jack Skellington: [sung] Well, what the heck, I really did my best/And by God I really tasted something swell, that's right/And for a moment, why, I even touched the sky/And at least I left some stories they can tell, I did/And for the first time sin...
Devlin: I can't help recalling some of your remarks about being a new woman. Daisies and buttercups, wasn't it? Alicia: You idiot! What are you sore about, you knew very well what I was doing! Devlin: Did I? Alicia: You could have stopped me with one...
Young Noah: [while hanging from the Ferris Wheel] Will you go out with me? Young Allie: What? No. Young Noah: No...? Young Allie: No. Young Noah: Why not? Young Allie: I don't know, because I don't want to. Young Noah: OK, then you leave me no other ...
Rusty: Tell me this is not about her, or I am walking. I am walking off this job right now. Danny: Who? Rusty: Tess. Terry Benedict. Tell me this is not about screwing the guy who's screwing your wife. Danny: Ex-wife. Rusty: Tell me. Danny: It's not ...
Vincent: [Lance is looking for a medical book] Hurry up, Lance! We're losing her! Lance: I'm lookin' as fast as I can! Jody: [to Vincent] What's he looking for? Vincent: I dunno. Some book. Jody: [to Lance] What're you looking for? Lance: A little bl...
Pumpkin: The way it is now, you're taking the same risk as when you rob a bank. You take more of a risk, banks are easier. You don't even need a gun in a federal bank. I mean, they're insured, why should they give a fuck? I heard of this one guy, wal...
Sgt. Barnes: Talking about killing? Y'all experts? Y'all know about killing? I'd like to hear about it, potheads. [takes pipe and inhales drag] Sgt. Barnes: Why do you smoke this shit? So as to escape from reality? Me, I don't need this shit. I am re...
TV Repairman: Hey - who did Muffin take to the Masquerade Ball when her date came down with the measles? David: Her father. TV Repairman: That's right! And how'd she dress him? David: As Prince Charming. TV Repairman: Nice! Remember the one where Bud...
Will Turner: You knew my father. Pintel: Old Bootstrap Bill? Aye, we knew 'im. Never sat well with ol' Bootstrap, what we did to Sparrow and all. That's why he sent a piece of the treasure off to you, as it were. He said that we deserved to be cursed...
Mr. Darcy: Tell me, do you and your sisters very often walk to Meryton? Elizabeth Bennet: Yes, we often walk to Meryton. It's a great opportunity to meet new people. In fact, when you met us, we'd just had the pleasure of forming a new acquaintance. ...
[last lines] Norma Bates: [voiceover in police custody, as Norman is thinking] It's sad, when a mother has to speak the words that condemn her own son. But I couldn't allow them to believe that I would commit murder. They'll put him away now, as I sh...
Colorado Ryan: How'd you come out with Burdette? John T. Chance: He wanted to talk to his brother. Colorado Ryan: What'd he have to say? John T. Chance: Nothing. Colorado Ryan: You mean he didn't say anything? John T. Chance: Why are you so intereste...
Mr. Pink: We were set up. The cops were waiting for us. Nice Guy Eddie: What? Nobody set anybody up. Mr. Pink: The cops were there waiting for us! Nice Guy Eddie: Bull shit! Mr. Pink: Hey, fuck you, man! You weren't there - we were! And I'm tellin' y...
John Mooney: Are you disappointed? Charlie: Disappointed? Why should I be disappointed? I got rose bushes didn't I? I got a used car, didn't I? This other guy, what'd you call him? John Mooney: The beneficiary. Charlie: Yeah him, he got $3,000,000 bu...
Brandon Shaw: Determined to get drunk, aren't you? Phillip Morgan: I am drunk. Brandon Shaw: And just as childish as you were before when you called me a liar. Phillip Morgan: You had no business telling that story. Brandon Shaw: Why did you lie anyw...
Remy: [cooking a mushroom over the chimney] The key is to keep turning it. Get the smoky flavor niiice and even... [thunder rumbles in the distance] Emile: That storm's getting closer. Hey, Remy? You think that maybe we shouldn't be so... [lightning ...
