Caine: Nigga, I know you ain't dumb enough to be showin' niggas the robbery tape, man. What's up with that? O-Dog: Man, cool out, nigga. We just havin' fun with the motherfuckin' tape. Damn, alright, ain't nobody else gonna see the tape. The shit is ...
Johnny Boy: Y'know Joey Clams... Charlie: Yeah. Johnny Boy: ...Joey Scallops, yeah. Charlie: I know him too, yeah. Johnny Boy: ...yeah. No. No, Joey Scallops is Joey Clams. Charlie: Right. Johnny Boy: Right. Charlie: ...they're the same person! Johnn...
Morpheus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how dee...
Oracle: Do you know what that means? [points to a banner] Oracle: It means know thy self. I wanna tell you a little secret, being the one is just like being in love. No one needs to tell you you are in love, you just know it, through and through.
Malcolm X: [narrating] Like every hustler, I was trapped. Cats that hung out together trying to find a solution found nothing. Cats that might have probed space or cured cancer, West Indian Archie might haved been a mathematical genius... but we were...
[attempting to push Santa down the pipe] Shock: I think he might be too big! [she tries again, he groans] Lock: No, he's not! If he can go down a chimney... he can fit... [shoves] Lock: down... [shoves again] Lock: ...here! [Santa slides down the pip...
Police officer: Attention. Attention, citizens. Terrible news. There is still no sign of Santa Claus. Although the imposter has been shut down. It looks like Christmas will have to be cancelled this year. I repeat: The imposter has been shot down, bu...
Wendell: You know, there might not have been no money. Ed Tom Bell: That's possible. Wendell: But you don't believe it. Ed Tom Bell: No. Probably I don't. Wendell: It's a mess, ain't it, sheriff? Ed Tom Bell: If it ain't, it'll do till the mess gets ...
Steven Connolly: What're you having for tea, Miss? Sheba Hart: I don't know, I'll probably buy something on the way home. Steven Connolly: Are you a good cook? Sheba Hart: Not really. Steven Connolly: You suck? Sheba Hart: [turns around and notices S...
Lasky, Guard at Walleyworld: That's not a real gun, is it Clark? Clark: Are you kidding? This is a Magnum P.I. Lasky, Guard at Walleyworld: It's a BB gun! Clark: Don't tempt me. I could put an eye out with this thing. Lasky, Guard at Walleyworld: You...
Ellen Griswold: Clark, let's just skip the house of mud. I think Dodge City was enough fun for one day. Besides, Catherine and Eddie are expecting us. Clark: It's living history Ellen. But if you'd rather see your cousins. Personally I'd rather see a...
[last lines] [Danny has just got out of jail] Danny: Hi! Tess: Hi. We need to get Rusty a girl. Rusty: There's a women's prison down the road. Danny: [noticing Tess is wearing her wedding ring] You said that you sold this. Tess: I said that. Danny: L...
Jeannine: Conrad, I'm not a very good bowler, what I mean is, I'm a funny bowler. Conrad "Con" Jarrett: Oh, well we don't have to go bowling if you'd rather not. How funny are ya? Jeannine: On a scale of one to ten... about a ten. Conrad "Con" Jarret...
Boss Spearman: Brought you a cigar, all the way from Havana, Cuba. Percy: You don't say. I've heard about them but I've never had one. Much obliged to you. Boss Spearman: What do you think? Percy: Better than them crappers I usually smoke.
[Insisting John help his son] Elsie: If you don't, I'll leave you. I'll find work. I'll do whatever it takes to get away from here. I'll live in a tree to get away from you. Don't you think I won't. John: [Softly] Where would you go? Elsie: Myrtle Be...
Ulysses Everett McGill: What'd the devil give you for your soul, Tommy? Tommy Johnson: Well, he taught me to play this here guitar real good. Delmar O'Donnell: Oh son, for that you sold your everlasting soul? Tommy Johnson: Well, I wasn't usin' it.
Grace: Whoever took the curtains wants to kill my children. Mrs. Mills: Now, why do you think the daylight would kill them? Grace: Are you mad? I already told you my children are photosensitive. THE LIGHT WILL KILL THEM! Mrs. Mills: Yes, but that was...
Josey Wales: Now remember, when things look bad and it looks like you're not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. 'Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That's just the way it is.
George Taylor: [to Nova] Did I tell you about Stewart? Now there was a lovely girl. George Taylor: The most precious cargo we'd brought along, she was... to be the new Eve. George Taylor: With our hot and eager help, of course. George Taylor: Probabl...
Inigo Montoya: But this is Buttercup's true love - If you heal him, he will stop Humperdinck's wedding. Miracle Max: Wait. Wait. I make him better, Humperdinck suffers? Inigo Montoya: Humiliations galore! Miracle Max: That is a noble cause. Give me t...
[Chris Taylor takes his first hit of marijuana] Sgt. Elias: First time? Chris Taylor: Yeah. Sgt. Elias: Then the worm has definitely turned for you, man. Feel good? Chris Taylor: Yeah, it feels good. I got no pain in my neck now. Sgt. Elias: Feeling ...
