Vaughan Cunningham: I'm just going to say it. I'm gay. Does that surprise you that I'm gay? You know what gay is, don't you? Karl: I don't reckon. Vaughan Cunningham: [quietly] Homosexual. I like men sexually. Karl: Not funny 'ha-ha', funny queer. Va...
Dr. Jerry Woolridge: I won't lie to you. He did get into that trouble a while ago, but then we has young. Bill Cox: I remember well. He cut those folks to pieces and his Mama was one of them. Scooter: And that old Dixon boy. Oh, hell, I always wanted...
Karl: I'm your boy. Frank Childers: I ain't got no boy. Karl: I'm your oldest boy. Name of Karl. Frank Childers: I ain't got no boy. Karl: They turned me loose from the nervous hospital. 'Said I was well. I got hired on by a Mr. Bill Cox fixing lawnm...
[Dwight has been pulled over by a policeman on a motorcycle, with Jackie-Boy slumped over dead in the passenger seat] Motorcycle Cop: Your buddy there... Partied a little too hard tonight? Dwight: [staring coldly at the cop] I'm the designated driver...
Ann Newton: [Answering the phone] Newton's residence, Ann Newton speaking. Oh, hello, Mrs Henderson, this is Ann. No, Mother isn't here. A telegram? Well... [looks right, then left] Ann Newton: I don't see a pencil so I'll have to have her call you b...
[after Philip has been bitten] Philip: You didn't call the doctor, did you? Barbara: Well, I thought we ought to be on the safe side. Philip: I'm quite all right, Barbara, I ran it under a cold tap. Barbara: I really think... Philip: We had our jabs ...
Queen: Now, a formula to transform my beauty into ugliness. Change my queenly raiment to a peddler's cloak. Mummy dust, to make me old. To shroud my clothes, the black of night. To age my voice, an old hag's cackle. To whiten my hair, a scream of fri...
Lord Farquaad: Mirror, mirror, on the wall / Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all? Magic Mirror: Well, technically, you're not a king. Lord Farquaad: Ah, Thelonius? [Thelonius the Executioner smashes a small looking glass] Lord Farquaad: ...
Shrek: [to Donkey] WHY are you following me? Donkey: Oh, I'll tell you why. [starts to sing] Donkey: 'Cause I'm all alone / There's no one here beside me / My problems have all gone / There's no one to deride me! / But ya gotta have friends... Shrek:...
Mason: Nicole, did the Pied Piper take the children away because he was mad that the town didn't pay him? Nicole: That's right. Mason: Well, if he knew magic, if he could get the kids into the mountain, why couldn't he use his magic pipe to make the ...
C-3PO: I do believe they think I am some kind of god. Han Solo: Well, why don't you use your divine influence and get us out of this? C-3PO: I beg your pardon General Solo, but that just wouldn't be proper. Han Solo: Proper? C-3PO: It's against my pr...
Sévérine: Would you mind if I ask you a business question? James Bond: Depends on the question. Sévérine: It has to do with death. James Bond: A subject in which you're well-versed. Sévérine: And how would you know that? James Bond: Only a cert...
Jennifer Strunk: Would you like to meet Charlton Heston? He's our scorpion. Every night we throw in something new to him and watch him kill it. Daddy says it's like a Coliseum. Daddy says he wants to throw you into the Coliseum. George: No kidding. W...
Turkish: I don't want to go in there. He's a dangerous bastard. Taken too many disco biscuits in the heat of Russian disputations. He's got as many of these nuts as he has those nuts. Tommy: I don't care if he's got fucking hazelnuts. I want a gun th...
Cameron Winklevoss: [Arrogantly as they lead the other boats by a wide margin] Is there any way to make this a fair fight? Tyler Winklevoss: We could jump out and swim. Cameron Winklevoss: We'd have to jump out and drown. Tyler Winklevoss: Well, you ...
[fantasizing about how he'll get liquor] Seth: You dropped your purse, ma'am. Would you like me to help you with your groceries? Old Lady: Well that would be lovely young man. Would you like me to buy you alcohol? Seth: That would be lovely! [at the ...
Lt. Col. Anderson: What about *our* casualties? Captain Miller: Well, the figures were, 35 dead, times two wounded. They just didn't wanna give up those 88s. Lt. Col. Anderson: It was a tough assignment, that's why you got it. Captain Miller: Yes, it...
Dr. Mathias: [referring to Dr. Simon Tam who has just helped his sister, River Tam, escape] Gave up a brilliant future in medicine as well. It's madness. The Operative: Madness? [Ambles over to the holographic projection of River and Simon escaping t...
[R2-D2 tries repeatedly to control an elevator that Anakin and Obi-Wan are in while avoiding battle droids at the same time] Anakin Skywalker: What was that all about? Obi-Wan: Well, R2 has been... Anakin Skywalker: No loose wire jokes. Obi-Wan: Did ...
[last lines] Senator Bail Organa: Captain Antilles. Captain Antilles: Yes, Your Highness? Senator Bail Organa: I'm placing these droids in your care. Treat them well. Clean them up. Have the Protocol Droid's mind wiped. C-3PO: What? [R2-D2 beeps in a...
Henry Gondorff: What's your problem? Doyle Lonnegan: I'm putting half a million dollars on Lucky Dan to win, third race at Riverside Park. Henry Gondorff: Can't lay that off in time. A bet like that could break us. [Hooker stares at him incredulously...