Messenger: All that God-King Xerxes requires is this: a simple offering of earth and water. A token of Sparta's submission to the will of Xerxes. King Leonidas: Submission? Well that's a bit of a problem. See, rumor has it the Athenians have already ...
Tick: Well, listen to this one. After we did the ABBA show, Kevin had one of those liposuction penis enlargements. Felicia: He didn't? Tick: Yep. Do you know what they do? They siphon all the fat out of your love handles, and actually inject it into ...
Debbie Dunham: Is that tuck and roll? Terry Fields: Yeah! Debbie Dunham: That's bitchin' tuck and roll! You know, I really love the feel of tuck and roll upholstery. Terry Fields: You do? Debbie Dunham: Yeah. Terry Fields: Yeah? Well, get in and I'll...
Joe: [wearing sunglasses at night with two other members of the Pharoh's gang] Whadaya doin' creep? Curt Henderson: Who, me? Joe: No, I'm talkin' to the other fifty creeps here. You know Gil Gonzales? Curt Henderson: Gil Gonzales? No. No, I don't. Jo...
[Paul has no money for a subway token] Paul Hackett: Couldn't you just give me one token, please? Subway Attendant: I can't do that. I may lose my job. [Paul looks around and sees no one else in the station] Paul Hackett: Well, who would know... exac...
Boon: I want you to fix Pinto up, but it's got to be a very special girl. Pinto: Look, you don't have to... Boon: Now, she should be good-looking, but we're willing to trade looks for a certain... morally casual attitude. Katy: You mean you want some...
General Corman: Well, you see, Willard, in this war, things get confused out there. Power, ideals, the old morality, and practical military necessity. But out there with these natives, it must be a temptation to be God. Because there's a conflict in ...
Natasha Romanoff: You want to think about removing yourself from this environment, Doctor? Bruce Banner: [chuckles] I was in Calcutta, I was pretty well removed. Natasha Romanoff: Loki is manipulating you. Bruce Banner: And you been doing what, exact...
Caterpillar: Who... are... you? Alice: I- I hardly know, sir. I've changed so many times since this morning, you see... Caterpillar: No, I do not 'C.' Explain yourself. Alice: I'm afraid I can't explain myself sir, because I'm not myself, you know. C...
Head Nazi: White men! White women! The swastika is calling you. The sacred and ancient symbol of your race, since the beginning of time. The Jew is using The Black as muscle against you. And you are left there helpless. Well, what are you going to do...
Allison Reynolds: Your middle name is Ralph, as in puke, your birth date's March 12th, you're 5'9 and a half, you weigh 130 pounds and your social security number is 049380913. Andrew Clark: Wow. Are you psychic? Allison Reynolds: No. Brian Johnson: ...
Matt: [pulls out hamburger buns from paper bag] Oh, Ruth hates these. Willis Grinnel: What? Matt: I got the wrong kind of buns. Willis Grinnel: Maybe we can borrow hers. [points towards Natalie, who is bending over and feeding Duncan] Willis Grinnel:...
Marty McFly: [watching a Honeymooners episode in 1955] Hey, hey, I've seen this one. I've seen this one. This is a classic. This is, uh, where Ralph dresses up as a man from space. Milton Baines: What do you mean, you've seen this? It's brand new. Ma...
[last lines] Lt. General Frederick "Boy" Browning: I've just been on to Monty. He's very proud and pleased. Major General Urquhart: Pleased? Lt. General Frederick "Boy" Browning: Of course. He thinks Market Garden was 90% successful. Major General Ur...
Brandt: Mr. Lebowski is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier, once we get instructions for the money. The Dude: Why me, man? Brandt: He believes the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled your rug, and you are in a un...
Lord Bullingdon: [after Barry has whipped him repeatedly with a cane] Will that be all Mr. Redmond Barry? Redmond Barry: Yes, that will be all. Lord Bullingdon: Well then, look you now... from this moment, I will submit to no further chastisement fro...
Colonel James: I'm looking forward to seeing you in action. Jack says you've got a great big cock. Eddie Adams: Well, I don't know, I guess so. Colonel James: May I see it? Eddie Adams: Really? Colonel James: Please! [stares as Eddie lowers his short...
[Shougo has just finished bandaging Noriko's leg] Shuya: You know a lot about medicine. Shougo Kawada: Well, my father was a doctor. [a few minutes later, Shougo serves Noriko and Shuya food] Noriko Nakagawa: Wow! This is pretty good! Shougo Kawada: ...
Jesse: Well, I was driving around with this buddy of mine, he was a big atheist, and we came to a stop, next to this homeless guy. And my buddy takes out a 100 dollar bill, and leans out the window, and he says, "Do you believe in God?". And the guy ...
Thomas Leroy: What's going on? Nina: [crying] Lily! You made her my alternate? Thomas Leroy: Well there's always an alternate. Lily is the best choice. Nina: No, but she wants my role. Thomas Leroy: Every dancer in the world wants your role. Nina: No...
[after dropping through the ceiling on a rope and killing nine mobsters] Connor: Well, "Name one thing you're gonna need this stupid fucking rope for." Murphy: That was way easier than I thought. Connor: Aye. Murphy: You know, on TV you always got th...
