Mr. McDougal: Well this is a pleasant surprise. I wasn't expecting another deposit until the end of the month. Michael Sullivan: Actually, I'm making a withdrawal. [Pulls his gun] Michael Sullivan: And I want dirty money only, everything you're holdi...
Michael Sullivan, Jr.: Did you like Peter more than me? Michael Sullivan: No. I loved you both the same. Michael Sullivan, Jr.: You were always... different with me. Michael Sullivan: Was I? [Sullivan thinks for a while] Michael Sullivan: Well, I sup...
[Alan Shepard climbs into Freedom 7 to find a placard taped to the instrument panel reading "No Handball Playing In This Area". John Glenn looks in and smiles] Alan Shepard: [hands placard out to Glenn] Not very funny, John. John Glenn: Well, I thoug...
Vaughan Cunningham: I'm just going to say it. I'm gay. Does that surprise you that I'm gay? You know what gay is, don't you? Karl: I don't reckon. Vaughan Cunningham: [quietly] Homosexual. I like men sexually. Karl: Not funny 'ha-ha', funny queer. Va...
Dr. Jerry Woolridge: I won't lie to you. He did get into that trouble a while ago, but then we has young. Bill Cox: I remember well. He cut those folks to pieces and his Mama was one of them. Scooter: And that old Dixon boy. Oh, hell, I always wanted...
Karl: I'm your boy. Frank Childers: I ain't got no boy. Karl: I'm your oldest boy. Name of Karl. Frank Childers: I ain't got no boy. Karl: They turned me loose from the nervous hospital. 'Said I was well. I got hired on by a Mr. Bill Cox fixing lawnm...
[Dwight has been pulled over by a policeman on a motorcycle, with Jackie-Boy slumped over dead in the passenger seat] Motorcycle Cop: Your buddy there... Partied a little too hard tonight? Dwight: [staring coldly at the cop] I'm the designated driver...
Ann Newton: [Answering the phone] Newton's residence, Ann Newton speaking. Oh, hello, Mrs Henderson, this is Ann. No, Mother isn't here. A telegram? Well... [looks right, then left] Ann Newton: I don't see a pencil so I'll have to have her call you b...
[after Philip has been bitten] Philip: You didn't call the doctor, did you? Barbara: Well, I thought we ought to be on the safe side. Philip: I'm quite all right, Barbara, I ran it under a cold tap. Barbara: I really think... Philip: We had our jabs ...
Queen: Now, a formula to transform my beauty into ugliness. Change my queenly raiment to a peddler's cloak. Mummy dust, to make me old. To shroud my clothes, the black of night. To age my voice, an old hag's cackle. To whiten my hair, a scream of fri...
Lord Farquaad: Mirror, mirror, on the wall / Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all? Magic Mirror: Well, technically, you're not a king. Lord Farquaad: Ah, Thelonius? [Thelonius the Executioner smashes a small looking glass] Lord Farquaad: ...
Shrek: [to Donkey] WHY are you following me? Donkey: Oh, I'll tell you why. [starts to sing] Donkey: 'Cause I'm all alone / There's no one here beside me / My problems have all gone / There's no one to deride me! / But ya gotta have friends... Shrek:...
Mason: Nicole, did the Pied Piper take the children away because he was mad that the town didn't pay him? Nicole: That's right. Mason: Well, if he knew magic, if he could get the kids into the mountain, why couldn't he use his magic pipe to make the ...
Sherlock Holmes: There is a toxin, refined from the nectar of the rhododendron ponticum. It's quite infamous in the region of Turkey bordering the Black Sea for its ability to induce an apparently mortal paralysis. Enough to deceive even a medical mi...
C-3PO: I do believe they think I am some kind of god. Han Solo: Well, why don't you use your divine influence and get us out of this? C-3PO: I beg your pardon General Solo, but that just wouldn't be proper. Han Solo: Proper? C-3PO: It's against my pr...
Sévérine: Would you mind if I ask you a business question? James Bond: Depends on the question. Sévérine: It has to do with death. James Bond: A subject in which you're well-versed. Sévérine: And how would you know that? James Bond: Only a cert...
Jennifer Strunk: Would you like to meet Charlton Heston? He's our scorpion. Every night we throw in something new to him and watch him kill it. Daddy says it's like a Coliseum. Daddy says he wants to throw you into the Coliseum. George: No kidding. W...
Turkish: I don't want to go in there. He's a dangerous bastard. Taken too many disco biscuits in the heat of Russian disputations. He's got as many of these nuts as he has those nuts. Tommy: I don't care if he's got fucking hazelnuts. I want a gun th...
Cameron Winklevoss: [Arrogantly as they lead the other boats by a wide margin] Is there any way to make this a fair fight? Tyler Winklevoss: We could jump out and swim. Cameron Winklevoss: We'd have to jump out and drown. Tyler Winklevoss: Well, you ...
[fantasizing about how he'll get liquor] Seth: You dropped your purse, ma'am. Would you like me to help you with your groceries? Old Lady: Well that would be lovely young man. Would you like me to buy you alcohol? Seth: That would be lovely! [at the ...
Lt. Col. Anderson: What about *our* casualties? Captain Miller: Well, the figures were, 35 dead, times two wounded. They just didn't wanna give up those 88s. Lt. Col. Anderson: It was a tough assignment, that's why you got it. Captain Miller: Yes, it...
