Captain von Trapp: It's the dress. You'll have to put on another one before you meet the children. Maria: But I don't have another one. When we entered the abbey our worldly clothes were given to the poor. Captain von Trapp: What about this one? Mari...
Gorgeous George: It's a camp site, a pikey campsite... Tommy: Ten points. Gorgeous George: What we doing here? Tommy: We're buying a caravan. Gorgeous George: Off a pack of fuckin' pikeys? What's wrong with you? This will get messy. Tommy: Well not i...
[Boggs sizes Andy up] Boggs: Hey, anybody come at you yet? Anybody get to you yet? [Andy looks at him in puzzlement] Boggs: Hey, we all need friends in here. I could be a friend to you. [Andy walks away] Boggs: Hey... Hard to get. I like that...
Sweeney Todd: And who may it be said is your intended, sir? Judge Turpin: My ward... and pretty as a rosebud. Sweeney Todd: Pretty as her mother? Judge Turpin: [confused] Wha... what was that? Sweeney Todd: Nothing, sir. Nothing. May we proceed?
Stan: Hey you guys I found the clitoris. I think I can get Wendy to like me again. Cartman: Yeah I guess all's well that end's well. We can go home now. You dipshit!
Mr. Potato Head: Can we stop? My parts are killing me. Buzz Lightyear: How about a quick roll call? Everybody here? Mr. Potato Head: Not everybody. Buzz Lightyear: Who's behind? Slinky Dog: Mine... [Slinky Dog's back half catches up with the group]
[the toys are trying to enter an apartment building] Mr. Potato Head: I say we stack ourselves up, push the intercom and pretend we're delivering a pizza. Hamm: How about a ham sandwich? With fries and a hotdog? Rex: What about me? Hamm: Ah, you can ...
Sarah Connor: [checks the grocery bags Kyle has brought back to the hotel room] What've we got? Moth balls, corn syrup, ammonia. What's for dinner? Kyle Reese: Plastique. Sarah Connor: That sounds good. What is it? Kyle Reese: Nitroglycerine-base; it...
[first lines] Christof: We've become bored with watching actors give us phony emotions. We are tired of pyrotechnics and special effects. While the world he inhabits is, in some respects, counterfeit, there's nothing fake about Truman himself. No scr...
Travel Agent: Where would you like to go? Truman: Fiji. Travel Agent: When? Truman: [pats his suitcase] Today. Travel Agent: [types on her computer] Oh, I'm sorry, but we don't have another flight for a least a month. Truman: A month? Travel Agent: I...
Christof: As Truman grew up, we were forced to manufacture ways to keep him on the island. [flashback to Truman at school] Young Truman: I like to be an explorer, like the great Magellan. Teacher: [rolling down a map of the world] Oh, you're too late...
[last lines] Nick Naylor: Gentlemen, practise these words in front of the mirror: Although we are constantly exploring the subject, currently there is no direct evidence that links cellphone usage to brain cancer. Nick Naylor: Michael Jordan plays ba...
Derek Smalls: We're very lucky in the band in that we have two visionaries, David and Nigel, they're like poets, like Shelley and Byron. They're two distinct types of visionaries, it's like fire and ice, basically. I feel my role in the band is to be...
Old Rose: [about Jack drawing her naked] My heart was pounding the whole time. It was the most erotic moment of my life. Up until then, at least. Lewis Bodine: So what happened next? Old Rose: You mean, did we "do it"? Sorry to disappoint you Mr. Bod...
Ness: [looking at a gold chain Malone is holding] What is that? Malone: Ah, I'm among the heathen. That is my call box key, and that... is my St. Jude medallion. Ness: Saint who? George Stone: Santo Jude. The patron saint of lost causes. Malone: And ...
Gordon Deitrich: [about his TV show] We threw out the censor-approved script and shot a new one that I wrote this morning. Evey Hammond: [dumbfounded] Oh, my God... [Evey gulps her champagne as the TV camera pans over the clapping audience, revealing...
[the Bunch has just escaped from bounty hunters by blowing up a bridge] Dutch Engstrom: At least we won't have to worry about Deke Thornton. Pike Bishop: [laughs] Hell, no; not after ridin' a half a case of dynamite into the river! Sykes: [calmly] We...
Charlie Bucket: Hey Grandpa, what was that we just went through? Willy Wonka: Hsaw Aknow. Mrs. Teevee: Is that Japanese? Willy Wonka: No, that's Wonka wash, spelled backwards. That's it, ladies and gentlemen, the journey's over! Grandpa Joe: Finest b...
Eva: So, the daddy bear plants his seed in the mommy bear and it grows into an egg. Kevin, 6-8 Years: Is this about fucking? Eva: Do you know what that means? Kevin, 6-8 Years: The boy puts his pee pee in the girls doo doo.
WALL.E: W-W-WALL-E Mary: [Introducing herself] Mary. WALL.E: [Points to EVE] EE-va? Mary: Oh, yes, of course. Excuse me. [Backs herself out of the way so WALL-E can ride with EVE, the shuttle stops and Mary disembarks with a gasp] Mary: I-I didn't kn...
Orphan Leader: They write about our raids in the paper. Fox: Yeah. That's really heavy. The Orphans, right? Yeah, our youth worker, she talks about you guys all the time. Orphan: We ain't got one. Fox: Well, that must be because you guys are so bad, ...
