Quotes of: Wasteful-spending Keyword

All my writing is translated from Gibberish directly into Nonsense. So if my writing offends you, then don’t blame me—blame the translator.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I’m wearing shoes made of sea foam, and I am here to seduce the elderly. If you brought the geriatrics, then I brought the jellyfish.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

There are many men who deserve to die. The most deserving are those that claim to serve the public, but only serve up the public as dinner to the wolves.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I find politicians’ speeches moving. Sometimes I don’t even pack up before forever leaving their vicinity.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

Orafoura doesn’t know shit about what I said, said Orafoura, quoting The Mythical Mr. Boo to me about the shit that’s been said about him.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I wanted to make love in the rain, but owing to unfavorable (or, rather favorable) weather conditions, I took to the shower as a suitable substitute.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I invented underwear with only one leg hole, for people who like to concentrate on frozen orange juice while bungee jumping from a tampon string.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

He’s got the curly Irish hair. You can’t eat him because he might be your father, and you’ll spoil your dinner.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I won’t bring you a single rose to be romantic, but I will point out that our relationship itself is the rose, and it’s our goal to see that it blossoms.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

We had sex by the fireplace. I remember because my waxy nipples started dripping on the carpet.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I got hit on at the bar last night, and this morning I have a black eye. Sometimes you can be so sexy that you offend, I guess.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I suspect I’ll be suspicious for my whole life that Saturday night is sleeping with Sunday morning.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I love so much you could probably see my affection from space with the naked eye (take off your eyelids, woman!)

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

My thermos does such a good job of keeping my tea hot that it feels like I’m drinking iced tea.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I don’t think I’d come off well on TV. But if you ever see me on, my advice is to add more bleach and keep scrubbing the screen.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

It’s good if you think bad thoughts, because at least you’re thinking. That’s more than most people do.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

Inside my skull is a turtle shell. Inside the turtle shell is a rabbit. And inside the rabbit, all my tasty thoughts constantly stew.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I want to make a splash in the world, and I want to make one with my dry wit. My dry wit is wetter than you’d imagine.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I often wonder how far I’d go for love. I guess it all depends on the price of gas. 

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

Andrew is such a diplomatic name. Or at least it is for the first three letters, as and is a word that works hard to join things together and promote cohesiveness.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

I may have written this before, but I may not have written it as well, so I’ll write it again.

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.