Randal Graves: [to Emma] You became persona non-nookie to me the minute he started diddling your pooter. Emma: So thinking of me in terms of being a girl kind of creeps you out, does it? Randal Graves: Sweetheart, I don't think of you in terms of bei...
Shaniqua: [talking on the phone] Mr. Ryan, your father has been to the clinic three times in the last month. He's been treated for a urinary tract infection that is by no means an emergency. Now, if you have any more questions about your HMO plan, wh...
[first lines] Businessman: You don't like flying, do you? John McClane: What gives you that idea? Businessman: You wanna know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on...
Providence Gangster #1: Come on Babu, I can't do any more. I can't go off, please don't make me go back empty handed. Please don't do this. I wanna help you. Pakistani Proprietor: Come to my store next Friday. I'll give you the money... Providence Ga...
Dory: I saw a boat. Marlin: You did? Dory: Yeah, it went by not too long ago. Follow me. [few seconds later, she starts zig-zagging in front of him and glancing back] Dory: Would you quit it? What, the ocean isn't big enough for you or something like...
Skylar: What is your obsession with this money? My father died when I was 13 and I inherited this money. You don't think that every day I wake up and wish I could give it back? That I would give it back in a second if I could have one more day with h...
Barry the Baptist: [answering his phone] What? Dean: I thought you said there'd be no staff Barry! Barry the Baptist: Did you get those guns? Dean: You wanna see what they did to poor Gary? [calling out to a delirious Gary] Dean: Gary? Gary? Barry th...
Constance Harraway: You wanna tell me what's up? David Gale: Nothing. Everything. Something profoundly stupid happened last night. Constance Harraway: I hope you used a condom. [David looks at Constance] Constance Harraway: Oh Jesus Christ, David. Wa...
Charlotte: [after Bob tells her of his back pain] I'm in pain, I got my foot banged up. Wanna see it? Bob: [to Chef, sarcastically] How do you say no? [sees the foot] Bob: Oh, my gosh! When did you do this? Charlotte: I did it the other day, it hurts...
Reidenschneider: They got this guy, in Germany. Fritz Something-or-other. Or is it? Maybe it's Werner. Anyway, he's got this theory, you wanna test something, you know, scientifically - how the planets go round the sun, what sunspots are made of, why...
Royal: Are you trying to steal my woman? Henry Sherman: I beg your pardon? Royal: You heard me, Coltrane. Henry Sherman: Coltrane? Royal: What? Henry Sherman: Did you just call me Coltrane? Royal: No. Henry Sherman: You didn't? Royal: No. Henry Sherm...
Donkey: Shrek! Hold up, Shrek! You got to wait for the line! Shrek: [about to burst into the cathedral] What are you talking about? Donkey: The line, the line you gotta wait for: the priest's gonna say "Speak now or forever hold your piece", and you ...
Vincenzo Coccotti: Sicilians are great liars. The best in the world. I'm Sicilian. My father was the world heavy-weight champion of Sicilian liars. From growing up with him I learned the pantomime. There are seventeen different things a guy can do wh...
Woody: Listen, lightsnack, you stay away from Andy. He's mine, and no one is taking him away from me. Buzz: What are you talking about? Where's that bonding strip? [slides under his ship with a skateboard] Woody: [pulls him back out] And another thin...
Heather Holloway: This is Nick Naylor telling you kids, don't do drugs, smoke cigarettes Nick Naylor: That's really great, its like looking in the mirror Heather Holloway: New idea, cigarettes for the homeless, we'll call them hobos Nick Naylor: Haha...
Doug MacRay: Hey, next time you guys wanna take pictures of me, just call ahead. You know, we can do better than a barbecue. A calender shoot... you know, maybe topless, lubed up. Whatever you guys are into. The FBI car antenna's are half inch matte ...
[from Director's Cut] Ash: What are you? Are you me? Evil Ash: Whad are do? Are do be? HAHAHAHAHAH! You sound like a jerk! Ash: Why ya doin' this, huh? Evil Ash: Oh, you wanna know? 'Cause the answer's easy! I'm BAD Ash... and you're GOOD Ash! You're...
Ripley: How long after we're declared overdue can we expect a rescue? Hicks: [pause] Seventeen days. Hudson: Seventeen *days?* Hey man, I don't wanna rain on your parade, but we're not gonna last seventeen *hours!* Those things are gonna come in here...
Col. Quaritch: You are not in Kansas anymore. You are on Pandora, ladies and gentlemen. Respect that fact every second of every day. If there is a Hell, you might wanna go there for some R & R after a tour on Pandora. Out there beyond that fence ever...
Ava Gardner: [infuriated to learn that Hughes was tapping her phone lines to keep an eye on her] What do you wanna know, Howard? Was I screwing Artie Shaw last night? Was I screwing Sinatra the night before? You bet! Everyone told me you were a godda...
Bruce Wayne: [about the prototype Batsuit] Tear resistant? Lucius Fox: This sucker will stop a knife. Bruce Wayne: Bulletproof? Lucius Fox: Anything but a straight shot. Bruce Wayne: Why didn't they put it into production? Lucius Fox: Bean counters d...
