[Peter is wearing shorts, sandals and a paisley shirt, with his feet up on his desk, munching chips and playing tetris on his computer] Bill Lumbergh: So, Peter, what's happening? Aahh, now, are you going to go ahead and have those TPS reports for us...
Lance: [answering the phone] Hello. Vincent: Lance! It's Vincent. I'm in big fuckin' trouble, man. I'm coming to your house. Lance: Whoa. Whoa. Hold your horses, man. What's the problem? Vincent: I've got this chick, she fuckin' O.D.in' on me! Lance:...
Chris Taylor: [narrating] Well, here I am, anonymous, all right. With guys nobody really cares about. They come from the end of the line, most of them, small towns you never heard of: Pulaski, Tennessee; Brandon, Mississippi; Pork Bend, Utah; Wampum,...
[first lines] Young Elizabeth: [singing] Yo, ho, yo, ho/ a pirate's life for me/ Yo, ho, yo, ho/ it's a pirate's life for me/drink up me hearties, yo, ho... Mr. Gibbs: [surprises her by coming up from behind her] Quiet, missy! Cursed pirates sail the...
Glen: How many Polacks it take to screw up a lightbulb? H.I.: I don't know, Glen. One? Glen: Nope, it takes three. [Glen laughs. H.I. doesn't] Glen: Wait a minute, I told it wrong. Here, I'm startin' over: How come it takes three Polacks to screw up ...
Dot: [GASPS after seeing Nathan Jr] What's his name? Ed McDonnough: Uh... Hi... Hi Junior, till we think of a better one. Dot: Why don't ya call him Jason? l just love biblical names. If I had another little boy, I'd name him Jason, Caleb or Tab. [GA...
Alain van Versch: [after having sex with Stéphanie for the first time] Was it good? It still works? Stéphanie: Yes. No... I don't know... It's different. It's hard to say after just one... Alain van Versch: Yeah but I can't now. I have to go. Stép...
Royal: Are you trying to steal my woman? Henry Sherman: I beg your pardon? Royal: You heard me, Coltrane. Henry Sherman: Coltrane? Royal: What? Henry Sherman: Did you just call me Coltrane? Royal: No. Henry Sherman: You didn't? Royal: No. Henry Sherm...
[picks up the phone] David Mills: Hello? John Doe: I admire you. I don't know how you found me, but imagine my surprise. I respect you law enforcement agents more everyday. David Mills: Well, I appreciate that... John. I tell you... John Doe: No, no,...
James Bond: So this is it. We're both played out. M: Well, if you believe that, why did you come back? James Bond: Good question. M: Because we're under attack. And you know we need you. James Bond: Well, I'm here. M: You'll have to be debriefed and ...
Captain Miller: Get your gear. Let's go. [Reiben stays put] Sergeant Horvath: You heard him, gear up. Your captain just gave you an order. Private Reiben: Yeah, like the one he gave to take this machine gun. That was a real doosey, wasn't it? [walks ...
James T. Kirk: What are you doing? Leonard 'Bones' McCoy: I'm doing you a favor. I couldn't just leave you there looking all pathetic. Take a seat. I'm gonna give you a vaccine against viral infection from Melvaren mud fleas. James T. Kirk: OW! What ...
Sarah Connor: So Reese is crazy? Dr. Peter Silberman: In technical terminology: he's a loon. Lieutenant Ed Traxler: [shows a bullet-proof vest] Sarah, this is what they call body armor. Our tac guys wear these. It can stop a 12-gauge round. This othe...
Doug MacRay: Hey, next time you guys wanna take pictures of me, just call ahead. You know, we can do better than a barbecue. A calender shoot... you know, maybe topless, lubed up. Whatever you guys are into. The FBI car antenna's are half inch matte ...
Alpha: [On a communicator on Beta's collar] This is Alpha calling Dug. Come in, Dug. Dug: Hi Alpha. Hey, your voice sounds funny. Alpha: I know, I know! Have you seen the bird? Dug: Why, yes. The bird is my prisoner now. Gamma: Yeah, right! [Kevin hi...
Captain: Define "hoe-down". Ship's Computer: Hoe-down: A social gathering at which lively dancing would take place. Captain: [AUTO appears near the captain] AUTO! Earth is amazing! These are called "farms". Humans would put seeds in the ground, pour ...
Kyle: I was in the neighborhood - I was just on a date with Claire, the girl I met at the bookstore? My date did not go well, unfortunately, due to a lack of chemistry... and, I think, an overuse of profanity on my part. But, whilst on my date... I r...
[Black Widow is flying a Quinjet, while a maskless Captain America and helmetless Iron Man stand in the back keeping an eye on Loki] Steve Rogers: I don't like it. Tony Stark: What? Rock of Ages giving up so easily? Steve Rogers: I don't remember it ...
Col. Quaritch: You are not in Kansas anymore. You are on Pandora, ladies and gentlemen. Respect that fact every second of every day. If there is a Hell, you might wanna go there for some R & R after a tour on Pandora. Out there beyond that fence ever...
[when making the payoff] The Dude: Dude. Nihilist: [on the phone] Who is this? The Dude: Dude. The bag man, man. Where do you want us to go? Nihilist: Us? The Dude: [to Walter] Shit! [to Nihilist] The Dude: Uh. Yeah, uh. Me and, uh, the driver. I'm n...
The Joker: [when Batman picks up the phone in Andrea's apartment] Hello, anybody home? Listen, boopsie, even though you never call and never write, I still got a soft spot for you. So I'm sending you a fun gift, airmail! And there's no use jumping ou...
