You people who have survived childhood don't remeber any longer what it was like. You think children are whole, uncomplicated creatures, and if you split them in two with a handy axe there would be all one substance inside, hard candy. But it isn't h...
I never need to find time to read. When people say to me, ‘Oh, yeah, I love reading. I would love to read, but I just don’t have time,’ I’m thinking, ‘How can you not have time?’ I read when I’m drying my hair. I read in the bath. I rea...
I whispered to Dad during Rosh Hashanah services, "Do you believe in God?" "Not really," he said. "No." "Then why do we come here?" He sucked thoughfully on his Tums tablet and put his arm around me, draping me under his musty woolen prayer shawl, an...
In 1494, King Charles VIII of France invaded Italy. Within months, his army collapsed and fled. It was routed not by the Italian army but by a microbe. A mysterious new disease spread through sex killed many of Charles’s soldiers and left survivors...
I believe it was Shakespeare, or possibly Howard Cosell, who first observed that marriage is very much like a birthday candle, in that 'the flames of passion burn brightest when the wick of intimacy is first ignited by the disposable butane lighter o...
When you get down to the bottom of it, only about half of what we remember really happened. We tend to modify things to make ourselves look better in our own eyes and in the eyes of others. Then, if what we did wasn't really very admirable, we tend t...
How aware are we of our own inner life, our spirituality-something so intangible yet so priceless? How much effort do we make to perceive that which is not obvious, which can neither be seen nor heard? I believe the exploration and enrichment of the ...
We all share three things in common: We are breathing, we have a heart, and most importantly we have twenty four hours to live. With those things, we should not have an excuse as to why the dash between our birth and death dates is so much more small...
Wouldn't the world be a much better place if we didn't make it past the age of maybe 10? Think back to when we were younger, before we were so easily influenced by adults. We rebelled against everything that we now believe is impossible. Super Heroes...
A public library is the most democratic thing in the world. What can be found there has undone dictators and tyrants: demagogues can persecute writers and tell them what to write as much as they like, but they cannot vanish what has been written in t...
Artists are agents of chaos. It is the artists job to encourage entropy, to promote chaos. Idols must be killed, icons crushed, beliefs shattered. It is the artists job to encourage legitimate, unadulterated, raw thought and emotion. Art that does no...
I was very much a tough New York street kid. I went to a school where you had to learn how to get along with everybody or fight with everybody, and I did my fair share of both. But you have to learn how to get along. I did an awful lot of fighting. I...
Jim Garrison: What I need to know is why. Why are you telling us this? Willie O'Keefe: Cause that motherfucker Kennedy, stole that motherfuckin' election, that's why. Nixon, was gonna be one of the great presidents 'till Kennedy wrecked it up. Got ni...
Andrew Wyke: It's a good thing, I am pretty much of an Olympic sexual athlete. Milo Tindle: Yes, I suppose these days you are concentrating more on the sprints than on the long distance stuff. Andrew Wyke: Not so dear boy! I am in the peak of conditi...
Cindy: Dean, I give you this ring... Justice of the Peace: As a symbol. Cindy: As a symbol... Justice of the Peace: Of my solemn vow. Cindy: Of my solemn vow... Justice of the Peace: And everlasting love. Cindy: And everlasting love... Justice of the...
Samantha: [as the family leaves their house for the last time before moving] Goodbye, yard! Goodbye, crepe myrtle! Goodbye, mailbox! Goodbye, box of stuff Mommy won't let us take with us but we don't want to throw away. Goodbye, house, I'll never lik...
[Old Sixsmith notices the "shooting star"-shaped birthmark] Old Rufus Sixsmith: That's a very peculiar birthmark. Luisa Rey: Yeah, my mom was sure it was going to be cancerous and kept trying to get me to remove it, but... I kinda like it. Old Rufus ...
[Frobisher is misplaying Ayrs' composition] Vyvyan Ayrs: [pained] Stop. Please. You're hurting me. You must have misheard me. I said a "melody", not a "malady". [Jocasta enters] Jocasta Ayrs: Vyvyan? Vyvyan Ayrs: Jocasta! Deliver me. Jocasta Ayrs: Wh...
Mercedes: Albert, I found the note you left explaining where you'd gone. But now I must explain something to you. Where you've really come from. Albert, you are the son of Edmond Dantes. The man you know as the Count of Monte Cristo. [Albert Mondego ...
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating, after Mother breaks the Old Man's Major Award, and he is unsuccessful at repairing it] With as much dignity as he could muster, the Old Man gathered up the sad remains of his shattered major award. Later that night, alon...
Mr. Frank Shirley: Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on. It's people that make the dif...