Quotes of: Toilet-paper Keyword

France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.

Billy Wilder

When you go to jail, there's so much simple stuff missing. You just want some good toilet paper or a real toothbrush, a real blanket and a real bed to lay in.

Ja Rule

Some kid asked what a dilemma is. And I replied: When a starving man has to choose between a plate of food, and, a roll of toilet paper.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I have a very silly sense of humor. I've never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe.

Paula Poundstone

Timmy, who made a daring escape, also made a mistake of paying the taxi driver with a check made out of toilet paper.

Janet Frame

I really can't be bothered going to a barber. And shaving every morning, that's nightmarish. I spent my teenage years covered in tiny little bits of toilet paper.

Alan Moore

When you consider all the writers who never even had a machine. Who would have given an eyeball for a good typewriter. Any typewriter. All the ones who wrote on a matchbook covers. Paper bags. Toilet paper. Who had their writing destroyed by their ja...

True West

The stench that surrounded me suggested that the tarp over my face had been previously used either to transport fertiliser or as toilet paper.

A Girl Named Digit

I make love like a brick could be used as toilet paper. Sure, it’s rough, but I thought you liked that shit. 

Blanket

A brick could be used as toilet paper—especially if you just shit a brick. You could shit and wipe your way to a wall of privacy. 

Brick

I want to write a poem about "Truth," "Honor," "Dignity," and whether the toilet paper should roll over or under when you pull on it.

I Want

Wrap your hand in toilet paper before you meet someone. It’ll change how much people respect you.

Sleepwalking is restercise

I’ve felt alone, cold, and clothed in shame for too long. Let the sunlight be my blanket, wardrobe, and toilet paper.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Boxes of toilet paper make the best birthday presents. They really show I give a shit.

A Zebra is the Piano of the Animal Kingdom

I don't think many people understand what racism is. The intellectuals use it like toilet paper; it's something they can use. It's not something they live.

Mark Fuhrman

I have the largest collection of Hulk memorabilia in the world - everything from toilet paper, wallpaper, bicycles - all boxed up at my house in Northern California. I've had it for so long, I think it might be time to sell it.

Lou Ferrigno

I had a dream about you. We watched the water in the toilet swirl down like a liquid tornado, and we wondered if we’d just flushed away our last chance at love. We’d used all the toilet paper, so you had nothing to blow your nose with. So I gave ...

We Had A #Dream About You

You haven’t lived until you’ve wiped your ass with a pile of sand. Toilet paper doesn’t measure eternity the way the sands of time do.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Love is like a forest, I think as I kill trees by squandering toilet paper while “decorating” my ex girlfriend’s front yard.

This Book Has No Title

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

Rod Serling

You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff.

Don Van Vliet