Quotes of: Toilet-paper Keyword

I want to publish a book on toilet paper—not only about toilet paper, but actually print it on toilet paper. That way nobody will be surprised by how shitty my book is.

This Book is Not FOR SALE

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper.

Daphne Zuniga

I like getting toilet paper thrown at me.

Joel Madden

The Persian rug served as their country. The brawnier toilet paper people opted to live in its jade green jungles while the more sensitive and reflective toilet paper people preferred hiding in its opal cream sky. They were so light. No one would eve...

Toilet Paper People: no ONE is perfect

Stay humble as a writer: write on toilet paper.

Jonas Eriksson

It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.

George Lindsey

Life before toilet paper was not worth living.

Styxx

You're the man who stands on the street corner with a roll of toilet paper, and written on each square are the words, 'I love you.' And each passer-by, no matter who, gets a square all his or her own. I don't want my square of toilet paper.' I didn't...

God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater

Simon: [unravelling a roll of toilet paper] Go, go! Join the others!

Death at a Funeral

Make your life like toilet paper. Long and usefull.

100 Quotes to Make You Think!

I'm out of tissues for toilet paper too. History notes just aren't....up to scratch

Stray

He spun out enough toilet paper to vandalize a house and carefully cleaned the seat.

Cold Cereal

There’s bird shit on my toilet paper, and my asshole stings from such a long flight.

The Merits of Marthaism, and How Being Named Susan Can Benefit You

Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.

Joey Bishop

Still on speaking terms with the Toilet Paper People, they consented to a box full of Legos that overnight manifested itself into a recording studio. I quickly remembered the power of my hands, my imagination, my will, and my conscience. These were t...

Toilet Paper People: no ONE is perfect

Mrs. Spence picks up a roll of toilet paper from the counter and scrunches her nose. “Ask Caymen about that,” Xander says. Great, now I have to explain to his mother about my vandalism? “Your son called me with a toilet paper emergency. I rushe...

The Distance Between Us

One of the most jolting days of adulthood comes the first time you run out of toilet paper. Toilet paper, up until this point, always just existed. And now it's a finite resource, constantly in danger of extinction, that must be carefully tracked and...

Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps

A politician’s autobiography is a book that’s nothing more than a collection of paper, like toilet paper, only it’s stacked instead of rolled.  

Sleepwalking is restercise

I live with three boys, and I can't tell you how hard it is to get your hands on toilet paper. They steal it.

Margot Robbie

When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.

Jennifer Aniston

France is the country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper.

Billy Wilder