Kevin McCallister: I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices; including inbetween my toes and in my belly button, which I never did before but sort of enjoyed. I washed my hair with adult formula shampo...
Howl: This war is terrible, they bomb from the southern coast to the northern border. It's all in flames now. Calcifer: I can't stand the fire and gunpowder. Those dopey guys have absolutely no manners. Howl: My own kind attacked me today. Calcifer: ...
Ellen Brody: [to Chief Brody] You told me the shark was caught. And I, I heard it on the news... I heard it on the Cape station. Hooper: They caught A shark, not THE shark. Big difference. Not the shark that killed Chrissie Watkins... and probably no...
Scuttle: You see the snarfblatt dates back to pre-hysterical times when humans would sit around and stare at each other all day. [long pause] Scuttle: got very boring. So they invented this snarfblatt to make fine music, allow me! [Attempts to blow t...
Maitre d': Et maintenant, would monsieur care for an aperitif, or would he prefer to order straightaway? Today, we have for appetizers - excuse me - uh, moules marinières, pâte de foie gras, beluga caviar, eggs Benedictine, tarte de poireaux - that...
Elise: What are you doing today? Nemo Nobody adult: I was thinking about taking the opportunity to wash the car. Elise: What's the deal with that car? Nemo Nobody adult: What do you mean? Elise: Why do you take such good care of that car while you le...
Jefferson Smith: Because of just one, plain, simple rule: Love thy neighbor. And in this world today, full of hatred, a man who knows that one rule has a great trust. You know that rule, Mr. Paine, and I loved you for it, just as my father did. And y...
Howard Beale: I would like at this moment to announce that I will be retiring from this program in two weeks' time because of poor ratings. Since this show is the only thing I had going for me in my life, I've decided to kill myself. I'm going to blo...
Sweeney Todd: What may I do for you today, sir? A stylish trimming of the hair? A soothing skin massage? Sit, sir, sit. Judge Turpin: [singing] You see, sir, a man infatuate with love, her ardent and eager slave. So fetch the pomade and pumice stone ...
Mrs. Lovett: So what are we gonna do about the boy? Sweeney Todd: Send him up! Mrs. Lovett: No, Mr. T. Surely one's enough for today. Besides, I was thinking of hiring the lad to help me run the shop. Your poor knees aren't what they used to be. Swee...
[having just gotten married] Clarence Worley: Well, hello, Mrs. Worley. Alabama: How do you do, Mr. Worley? Clarence Worley: Top o' the mornin', Mrs. Worley. Alabama: Bottom of the ninth, Mr. Worley. By the way, have you seen your lovely little wife ...
Caroline Wakefield: On the good days, I feel like I get it, like it all makes sense. I can stay in the moment, I don't have to control everything in the future, and I believe everything is gonna work out fine. On the bad days I just want to grab the ...
Pike Bishop: [talking about the railroad] There was a man named Harrigan. Used to have a way of doin' things. I made him change his ways. A hell of a lot of people, Dutch, just can't stand to be wrong. Dutch Engstrom: Pride. Pike Bishop: And they can...
Charlie Prince: [giving a toast] Here's to the four we lost in battle. And here's to the boss, who had to say goodbye to Tommy Darden today. And that's too bad. Ben Wade: Proverbs 13:3. "He that keepeth his mouth, keepeth his life. He that opens his ...
McKenzie: Hey, don't you have like 20 cards to write by Friday? Tom: Nope, all done. McKenzie: Really? Well, could you help me with mine? Because I'm running out of ways to say "Congratulations". So far, I've got: "Congrats", "Good job" and "Well don...
[first lines] Helinger: Mathematicians won the war. Mathematicians broke the Japanese codes... and built the A-bomb. Mathematicians... like you. The stated goal of the Soviets is global Communism. In medicine or economics, in technology or space, bat...
Jesse: You want to know why I wrote that stupid book? Celine: Why? Jesse: So that you might come to a reading in Paris and I could walk up to you and ask, "Where the fuck were you?" Celine: [laughing] No - you thought I'd be here today? Jesse: I'm se...
Il Duce: [the Saints break into Yakavettas courtroom] You people have been chosen to reveal our existence to the world! You will witness what happens here today, and you will tell of it later. All eyes to the front. Yakavetta: Now's a good time to fu...
Even in times of today, when one does not feel the need to go out of one's way for someone else, there are people who would. There are people who would be good to someone, share a smile with someone, care for someone and actually help someone, despit...
The secret message communicated to most young people today by the society around them is that they are not needed, that the society will run itself quite nicely until they - at some distant point in the future - will take over the reigns. Yet the fac...
Mary had been chosen, “favored” by God. But what a strange blessing. It brought with it none of the ideals or goals that so consume our daily striving. Today many assume that those whom God favors will enjoy the things we equate with a good life:...
