Back in high school, I wrote a novel about a character named Bart Simpson. I thought it was a very unusual name for a kid at the time. I had this idea of an angry father yelling 'Bart,' and Bart sounds kind of like bark - like a barking dog.
I've gone skydiving twice. I was terrified about doing it, but I wanted to overcome that. The first time, I did it with my parents and I remember that they had already both jumped out, and suddenly it was my turn. And I thought, 'Well, I don't want t...
It wasn't until I had been writing on and off for maybe ten years that I started to establish any kind of routine, thought I couldn't put a finger on an exact date, and this routine relates simply to the aphorism 'How do you eat an elephant? One bite...
Because I'm such a creative person, and I've always got my nose in a book, I suppose it was only a matter of time before non-fiction turned into fiction again. But I never consciously set out to become a writer and I never thought I'd be doing the th...
That's the nice thing about being a live act. I can get the audience, but it's for the moment. It's like, 'Can I do it tonight?' And you can see when people like you. But on record - and with the pen - it's almost for all time. Really, a lot more tho...
Yes, you have to be brave enough to take steps that your heart is telling you to take. Because when I decided to go into cricket, not one person told me I was making the right move. At that time, nobody thought the IPL would become so big. I was nerv...
On September 11, 2001, we thought we were going to be attacked many, many times between then and now. We haven't been. I believe we had a president who made the right decision at the right time... to put us on offense against terrorists.
One of the hardest things for me to do is watch myself. The first time I see it, I am obsessed with my left ear or my right ear or some other physical attribute, or the fact that I'm 60 or whatever shallow ego thought is running through my head. I'm ...
I dated all these girls and ended up not liking them and thought to myself, 'What was it that all of them had in common?' They had too much time on their hands. Even though they were pretty, they lacked something. A woman could be less attractive but...
Go out and interview people to find a partner whom you can trust. Find somebody who subscribes to the same view that you do. I'm happy to tell you that I practice what I preach. I would have never thought I'd end up in financial services.
Songs are my diaries; they always have been. You have to put your trust in everyone because putting down those real, personal details and thoughts that make a song authentic also opens you right up. I am constantly misunderstood; a lot of people just...
George Carlin is kind of my template now because George Carlin before was straight laced regular comic and he had short hair, a tie, suit, nightclub guy. Then he said screw it, let his hair grow, just started telling what he thought was the truth. So...
Reggie Lampert: [pondering] Is there a Mrs. Dyle? Alexander Dyle: Yes... [Reggie's face drops] Alexander Dyle: but we're divorced! Reggie Lampert: [Reggie smirks] I thought that was Peter Joshua? Alexander Dyle: I am just as difficult to live with as...
Vesper Lynd: Ten million was wired to your account in Montenegro, with the contingency for five more if I deem it a prudent investment. I suppose you've given some thought to the notion that if you lose, our government will have directly financed ter...
Pink: Don, have you ever thought about why we play football? How many times have you gotten laid strictly because you're a football player? Don: I don't know. A few, I guess.
Two-Face: You thought we could be decent men in an indecent time. But you were wrong. The world is cruel, and the only morality in a cruel world is chance. [holds up his coin] Two-Face: Unbiased. Unprejudiced. Fair.
[after visiting the scarred Dent in the hospital, Gordon emerges and sees Maroni there, leaning on a cane] Salvatore Maroni: This craziness... it's too much. Lt. James Gordon: You should have thought of that before you let the clown out of the box.
Salvatore Maroni: I thought the D.A. just played golf with the mayor, things like that? Harvey Dent: Tee off's one-thirty, more than enough time to put you away for life, Sally.
Lewis: Can that chubby boy handle himself? Ed: Bobby? He's rather well thought of in his field, Lewis. Lewis: Insurance? Shit. I never been insured in my life. I don't believe in insurance. There's no risk.
[first lines] Joel: [voice over] random thoughts for Valentine's day, 2004. Today is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap.
Kaffee: Anyway, since we seem to be out of witnesses, I thought I'd drink a little. Galloway: I still think we can win. Kaffee: Maybe you should drink a little.
