[immediately after making love with Max] Diana Christensen: What's really bugging me now is my daytime programming. NBC's got a lock on daytime - lousy game shows - and I'd like to bust them. I'm thinking of doing a homosexual soap opera, "The Dykes"...
Pop Fisher: I wanted to win that pennant worse than I wanted any goddamned thing in my life. You'd think I could just this once, wouldn't you? I didn't care nothing about the Series. Win or lose, I would have been satisfied.
Ellen Griswold: Clark, let's just skip the house of mud. I think Dodge City was enough fun for one day. Besides, Catherine and Eddie are expecting us. Clark: It's living history Ellen. But if you'd rather see your cousins. Personally I'd rather see a...
Boss Spearman: Brought you a cigar, all the way from Havana, Cuba. Percy: You don't say. I've heard about them but I've never had one. Much obliged to you. Boss Spearman: What do you think? Percy: Better than them crappers I usually smoke.
[Insisting John help his son] Elsie: If you don't, I'll leave you. I'll find work. I'll do whatever it takes to get away from here. I'll live in a tree to get away from you. Don't you think I won't. John: [Softly] Where would you go? Elsie: Myrtle Be...
Grace: Whoever took the curtains wants to kill my children. Mrs. Mills: Now, why do you think the daylight would kill them? Grace: Are you mad? I already told you my children are photosensitive. THE LIGHT WILL KILL THEM! Mrs. Mills: Yes, but that was...
Count Rugen: You must be that little Spanish brat I taught a lesson to all those years ago. You've been chasing me your whole life only to fail now? I think that's about the worst thing I've ever heard. [pause] Count Rugen: How marvelous.
Tangina: Help me tie this around my waist. Diane: What do you think you're doing? Tangina: I'm going in after her. Diane: She won't come to you. Let me go. Tangina: You've never done this before. Diane: Neither have you. [pause] Tangina: You're right...
Macaulay Connor: Look, who's doing the interviewing here? Elizabeth (Liz) Imbrie: Do you think she caught on somehow? Macaulay Connor: No, she was born like that, don't let her throw you. Elizabeth (Liz) Imbrie: Do you want to take over? Macaulay Con...
Dietrich: Doctor Jones, surely you don't think you can escape from this island? Indiana: That depends on how reasonable we're all willing to be. All I want is the girl. Dietrich: [looks at Belloq. Belloq shakes his head] And if we refuse? Indiana: Th...
H.I.: If it's all the same to you, Honey, I think I'll skip this little get together, slip out with the boys and knock back a couple of Coca Colas. [Ed gives him a look of disapproval] H.I.: I guess that wouldn't be such a good idea. Gale: So many so...
Brandon Shaw: It is a little difficult trying to keep up with your romances. After me came Kenneth, now it's David. Why the, the switch from Kenneth to David anyway? Janet Walker: Obviously I think he's nicer. Brandon Shaw: Well, he's certainly riche...
Chuck Yeager: Monkeys? You think a monkey knows he's sittin' on top of a rocket that might explode? These astronaut boys they know that, see? Well, I'll tell you something, it takes a special kind of man to volunteer for a suicide mission, especially...
Royal: Chas has those boys cooped up like a pair of jackrabbits, Ethel. Ethel: He has his reasons. Royal: Oh, I know that, but you can't raise boys to be scared of life. You gotta brew some recklessness into them. Ethel: I think that's terrible advic...
Dwight: Most people think Marv is crazy. He just had the rotten luck of being born in the wrong century. He'd be right at home on some ancient battlefield swinging an axe into somebody's face. Or in a Roman arena, taking his sword to other gladiators...
Katrina Anne Van Tassel: I have shed my tears for Brom... and yet my heart is not broken. Do you think me wicked? Ichabod Crane: No... but perhaps there is a little bit of witch in you, Katrina. Katrina Anne Van Tassel: Why do you say that? Ichabod C...
Eve: You know, Mallory's not as bad as you think. James Bond: He's a bureaucrat. Eve: You should do your homework. Gareth Mallory was a Lieutenant Colonel... James Bond: Lieutenant Colonel in Northern Ireland. Hereford Regiment. Spent three months at...
Maria: I can't seem to stop singing wherever I am. And what's worse, I can't seem to stop saying things - anything and everything I think and feel. Mother Abbess: Some people would call that honesty. Maria: Oh, but it's terrible, Reverend Mother.
Pat: The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That's guaranteed. I can't begin to explain that. Or the craziness inside myself and everyone else. But guess what? Sunday's my favorite day again. I think of what everyone did for me, and I fe...
Martin: You know, Laurie, I was just thinking that maybe it's about time you and me started going steady, huh? Laurie Jorgensen: Why, Martin Pawley, you and me been going steady since we was three years old! Martin: We have? Laurie Jorgensen: 'Bout t...
Stan: Hey you guys I found the clitoris. I think I can get Wendy to like me again. Cartman: Yeah I guess all's well that end's well. We can go home now. You dipshit!
