When there were no customers, he thought about geometry. He tried to perform the Pythagorean Theorem on the light fixture above him, given his estimate of its circumference, but he failed. He wanted to be good at math. But he just wasn’t. He wanted...
[Agent Monk has kidnapped the mayor] Agent Monk: You. I'm gonna tell you a story. A kid named Homer Wilkes lives 30 miles north of here. He'd just taken his girlfriend home and was walking along the road. A truck pulls up beside him. Four white boys ...
Jim Craig: Wait a second, I've given you all I've got, and now you're pulling the plug on me? Herb Brooks: Have you? Given me your very best? Because I know there's a lot more in you, a whole other level, that for some reason you just don't want to g...
Pimp Lester: [pointing gun at Oleg] Say hello to my little friend! Joey Gazelle: That's real fuckin' original. What are you, a fuckin' cartoon? Pimp Lester: I'm a Mack Daddy pimp! You know that. And now I'm gonna cap your ass, and when I'm finished w...
Sergeant Horvath: Stars. Lieutenant Dewindt: Yeah, Brigadier General Amend, deputy commander, 101st. Some fucking genius had the great idea of welding a couple of steel plates onto our deck to keep the general safe from ground fire. Unfortunately, th...
[Judge Doom about to "dip" Roger] Eddie Valiant: Hey, Judge. Doesn't a dying rabbit deserve a last request? Roger Rabbit: Yeah, nose plugs would be nice. Eddie Valiant: I think you want a drink. So, how about it, Judge? Judge Doom: Well, why not? I d...
Governor Crittenden: Jesse James sent me a telegram last month, saying he was going to kill me if he had to wreck a train to do it. He said that once I was in his hands he was going to cut my heart out and eat it in strips like it was bacon. [pause] ...
Randy: Can I get you something? Second Jive Dude: 'S'mofo butter layin' me to da' BONE! Jackin' me up... tight me! Randy: I'm sorry, I don't understand. First Jive Dude: Cutty say 'e can't HANG! Jive Lady: Oh, stewardess! I speak jive. Randy: Oh, goo...
Percy Garris: [singing] Oh don't you remember sweet Betsy from Pike / Crossed the high mountains with her lover Ike / Two yoke of oxen and big yellow dog / Called Shanghai rooster and one spotted hog / Hoodle-dang-hootie-i-doh, hoodle-dang-hootie-ay,...
Bruno: [Pavel is nursing Bruno] Where's my mum? Pavel - Jewish servant: She's out. Bruno: When will she back? Pavel - Jewish servant: Soon I expect, but don't worry. Bruno: Will I have I have to go to hospital? Pavel - Jewish servant: No, it's only a...
