[Ralphie is visiting Santa at the department store, only he can't remember what he wanted] Santa Claus: How about a nice football? Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Football? Football? What's a football? With unconscious will my voice squeaked out 'footb...
Angry Garage Sale Woman: How much for this dress? Rebecca: God, I can't believe you're selling that. Enid: That's $500. Angry Garage Sale Woman: What? Enid: 500. Angry Garage Sale Woman: You're crazy. It should be like $2. Enid: I was wearing that wh...
Foulfellow: [noticing Pinocchio] Look, Giddy, look! It's amazing, a live puppet without strings! A thing like that ought to be worth a fortune to someone. Now let me see... [sees poster for Stromboli's puppet show] Foulfellow: That's it! Stromboli! W...
Jane Bennet: Do you really believe he liked me, Lizzie? Elizabeth Bennet: Jane, he danced with you most of the night and stared at you for the rest of it. But I give you leave to like him. You've liked great deal a stupider person. You're a great dea...
Gail: [to the Oldtown Girls] We'll fight the cops, the mob, and anybody else who tries to move in on us. We'll go to war. Dwight: Don't be stupid, Gail. Get me a car. Gail: Who do you think you are? You got what you wanted out of us. [Gail puts the g...
Captain of Guards: What have you got? Old Woman: Well, I have a talking donkey. Captain of Guards: Really? Well, that's good for ten shillings... if you can prove it. Old Woman: Go ahead, little fella. [Donkey says nothing] Captain of Guards: Well? O...
Kyle Reese: The 600 series had rubber skin. We spotted them easy, but these are new. They look human... sweat, bad breath, everything. Very hard to spot. I had to wait till he moved on you before I could zero him. Sarah Connor: Look, I am not stupid,...
Jesse James: Well, Charley, did you hurt your leg? Charley Ford: Yeah, I slipped... I slipped off the roof and I smacked down into a snow bank, like a ton of stupidness. One second I'm screamin', "Woah Nelly!", Next second, poof, I'm neck-deep in sno...
Jake: What's this? Elwood: What? Jake: This car. This stupid car! Where's the Cadillac? [Elwood doesn't answer] Jake: The Caddy! Where's the Caddy? Elwood: The what? Jake: The Cadillac we used to have. The Bluesmobile! Elwood: I traded it. Jake: You ...
I figured I could get a job at a filling station somewhere, putting gas and oil in people's cars. I didn't care what kind of job it was, though. Just so people didn't know me and I didn't know anybody. I thought what I'd do was, I'd pretend I was one...
When we read, another person thinks for us: we merely repeat his mental process. In learning to write, the pupil goes over with his pen what the teacher has outlined in pencil: so in reading; the greater part of the work of thought is already done fo...
People often say that the English are very cold fish, very reserved, that they have a way of looking at things – even tragedy – with a sense of irony. There’s some truth in it; it’s pretty stupid of them, though. Humor won’t save you; it do...
I can't promise you that I won't hurt you," he said softly after it became clear I wasn't going to speak. Sincerity flowed from him like water in a river and it nearly broke my heart. "I can't say that I won't ever do something stupid, or forget your...
Perhaps there isn’t anything Alec is afraid of.” Magnus glanced at Alec and raised his eyebrows. “Boo,” he said. Jace was grinning. “Come on, surely you’ve got a phobia or two. What scares you?” Alec thought for a moment. “Spiders,”...
Training?'Clary echoed."But we trained yesterday." "Some of us have to train everyday,Clary."Jace didnt sound angry,but there was a harshness to his tone,and Clary flushed."Ill see you later,"he added without looking at her,and practically flung hims...
It is because of the Biblical curse on man's search for knowledge, which has so paralyzed his mind during the past ages, and its detrimental effect upon progress, that makes the Bible the most wicked, the most detestable, the most pernicious, and the...
Whenever Ingrid and I got out of the suburbs, into Berkeley or San Francisco, and saw how other people lived, Ingrid would cry at the smallest of things- a little boy walking home by himself, a discarded cardboard sign saying HUNGRY PLEASE HELP. She ...
It was so stupid, and random, but at that second, with the morning sun hitting her auburn hair, and her huge brown eyes fixed on him, the lock flew off the “do-not-allow-yourself-to-even-think-about-it” portion of his brain, and every feeling he ...
The marriage of a Jewish son is a bittersweet prospect. There is relief, always, that he has navigated the tantalizing and plentiful assemblies of non-Jewish women to whom the children of the Diaspora are inevitably exposed: from the moment he enters...
But one look at Wildcard's face, and he knew there was trouble. Problem? he signaled. Wildcard responded with an obscene gesture that more than conveyed his opinion that not only was this a problem, but it was a big problem. ... "Okay". That was not ...
Bah, he still saw the same stupidity. The image of the hanged man in the farming community of Yondern flashed through his mind. Now there was a war brewing between the Steelwielders and some foreign religion. More mindless loss over beliefs and mytho...
