I didn’t have enough money to tip the waitress, so I offered to take her out on a date, provided she paid for dinner. And picked me up.
In the Tunnel of Desire, past the Tube of Destiny, lies the Turtle of Doubt. We all have to face that turtle, but only the confident ones ever find out that doubt tastes like chicken.
Nobody can make you feel ignorant but you—the you from before, the one who skipped school and slept in class. By you, of course, I mean me.
I wrote my name on the list 10 years ago, and under the date I wrote “In the future.” But how’d I know I’d show up, and not my clone posing as me?
The government is so efficient it often takes two people to do the work of one. Actually, more accurately, it takes twice the manpower to do half the work.
I’m bilingual, speaking English and body language. I prefer the latter, because I can speak it silently and without listening and while my back is turned.
I remember that year as well as he does, though I was really young then and he is really old now. So I had no memory formation then, and he has Alzheimer’s now.
I run a Falconi Four operation out of my garage. If you’re not familiar with Vegas, you wouldn’t know what it is (it originated in Reno during the Falconi Reno Reign of Terror).
-I don’t want you to do anything. -Well then I won’t do anything. -Thank you. -Doing nothing, it’s the least I can do.
I once watched several criminals engage in an organized argument, while an audience of supporters cheered them on, but I was so disgusted that I had to turn off the political debate.
Just because I wear a size 14 shoe does not mean I’ll take it off when I go to shake your hand.
And the next morning, after a night of passionate sex, I said those three little words I knew she’d been waiting to hear: woman, I’m hungry.
Respect is something that should be earned, like eyebrows shaped like windshield wipers in a stormy arcade evening. I like my respect with lots of elbow room and melted cheese on top.
When a whisper seems like a shout, I know I need to get some sleep. But I can’t lay down without first taking off my bunny ears.
I breathe slowly and deeply. I make my eyes still under eyelids, I make my mind still, and soon, Sleep, seeing a perfect reproduction of himself, comes to be united with his facsimile.
Once you cry it out, it’s supposed to vanish…right? It’s not true. It’s just…a little less. It was the first chink in my brickwall. The wall was still there. And it was still made of bricks,but one, maybe two, had been torn down
The truth is, time marches on and you have two choices: You move forward, come what may, and you experience all the sour and sweet things that fly at you from around corners, or you sit still. Don't sit still.
Do you ... still believe?' 'Our very presence here, a Polynesian goddess sitting next to a Zulu thunder god, listening to the song of a Greek siren, should be proof enough that religions can and do coexist.' He looked back at the cross over the entry...
In stillness I notice how time and space disappear. All there is is the present moment and my willingness to listen...to allow the stillness to speak-Eileen Fisher
The pain of your loss will return. Less, but still considerable. I know you've worked hard to release it, but it can still take hold of you. I will help you sing away the fury, but I will not bear it for you.
The first time you view a house, you see how pretty the paint is and buy it. The second time you look to see if the basement has termites. It's the same with men.
