Noel Coward: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Here's a little number I tossed off recently in the Caribbean. [singing] Noel Coward: Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis? / Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong? / It's swell to have a stiffy. /...
Isaac Davis: You certainly fooled me. [crosstalk] Mary Wilke: What do you mean? Isaac Davis: I mean, I was shocked. 'cause that's not what - this is not what I expected. Mary Wilke: What did you expect? Isaac Davis: I don't know. You said you, you kn...
Mrs. Banks: Oh, George, you didn't jump into the river. How sensible of you! [Mr. Banks kisses her] Constable Jones: [into phone] It's all right, sir, he's been found! No, *alive*! Or so I presume, he's a-kissin' the Mrs. Banks. Mrs. Banks: I've been...
Herb Brooks: I got a telegram from a lady in Texas today, and you know what it said? Patty Brooks: What? Herb Brooks: Beat those Commie bastards. We're playing a hockey game against the greatest team in the world, and they're the best that's ever pla...
[last lines] Neil: [narration voice-over] And as we sat there listening to the carolers, I wanted to tell Brian it was over now and everything would be okay. But that was a lie, plus, I couldn't speak anyway. I wish there was some way for us to go ba...
[Caine Lawson reflecting after being shot] Caine: After stomping on Ilena's cousin like that, I knew I was gonna have to deal with that fool someday. Damn! I never thought he'd come back like this, blasting. Like I said, it was funny like that in the...
[last lines] Neo: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it...
Hallie: Rance, do you think I could... I mean, grown up and all... do you think I could learn to read? Ransom Stoddard: Why, sure you can, Hallie. Why, there's nothing to it. It'd be... it'd be easy. Can you learn how to read? Why, I can... I can tea...
Diz Moore: [dictating into phone] In protest, the whole Senate body rose and walked out. Clarissa Saunders: No! No, not that straight stuff. Now listen, kick it up, get on his side, fight for him! Understand? Diz Moore: You love this monkey - don't y...
Anton Chigurh: I'm looking for Llewelyn Moss. Desert Aire Manager: Did you go up to his trailer? Anton Chigurh: Yes, I did. Desert Aire Manager: Well, I'd say he's at work. Do you want to leave a message? Anton Chigurh: Where does he work? Desert Air...
Deborah Gelly: Noodles... you're the only person that I have ever... Noodles: Ever what? Noodles: Go ahead, ever what? Deborah Gelly: ...that I ever cared about. But you'd lock me up and throw away the key, wouldn't you? Noodles: Yeah. Yeah, I guess ...
Milton Waddams: [talking on the phone] And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they've ...
Del: [speaking to self while sitting in the car while it snows] Well Marie, once again my dear, you where as right as rain. I am, with out a doubt, the biggest pain in the butt that ever came down the pike. I meet someone whose company I really enjoy...
Prince Humperdinck: You truly love each other? Then you might have been truly happy! No couple in a century has that chance, no matter what the storybooks say. And so I think no man in a century will suffer as greatly as you will [Throws the lever on...
Marjane as a teenager: You say that our scarfs and trousers are indecent and that we put on make up, etc. As an art student, I'm often in the studio. I need to move freely in order to draw. A longer scarf will hinder me. As for our trousers, you say ...
Party Boy: [at Caesar's cage] Hey, check out this guy. Dodge Landon: Hey that one's a pain in the ass, man! He thinks he's special or something. Party Boy: Freaky. Come here. Come on. It's like he's thinking or something. Caesar: [grabs the man's thr...
Stanley Goodspeed: Oh, just some terrorists decided to send a little care package. Box of goodies. Which had to be neutralized before blowing up the office... [plucks a harsh note on his guitar] Stanley Goodspeed: So I took the rest of the day off. G...
Stanley Goodspeed: You broke out, let me see if I can get this straight, down the incinerator chute, on the mine car, through the tunnels to the power plant, under the steam engine - that was really cool by the way - and into the cistern through the ...
Raymond: Of course I don't have my underwear. I'm definitely not wearing my underwear. Charlie: I gave you a fresh pair of mine to wear. Where are they? Raymond: They're in the pocket of my jacket. Here. Charlie: I don't want them back. Raymond: Thes...
Charlie Fineman: I don't need to talk about her or look at pictures. 'Cause the truth is, a lot of times, I see her, on the street. I walk down the street, I see her in someone else's face. Clearer than any of the pictures you carry with you. I get t...
Chief Scientist: I agree with those who say we could launch a pod. Lyndon Johnson: A pot? Chief Scientist: A POD - a, uh, capsule. Now, we would be in full control of zis pod. It vill go up like a cannonball, and come down like, uh, a cannonball, spl...