Bob McClane: What is it that is exactly the same about every single vacation you have ever taken? Douglas Quaid: I give up. Bob McClane: You! You're the same. No matter where you go, there you are. It's always the same old you. Let me suggest that yo...
Mr. Potato Head: [while playing Battleship] Ah, ha. B-3. Hamm: Miss. G-6. Mr. Potato Head: Aw, you sunk it! [Hamm chuckles] Mr. Potato Head: Are you peeking? Hamm: Hey, quit your whining and pay up. [Mr. Potato Head plls off one of his ears] Hamm: No...
Truman's Mother: [looking through a photo album] Here's us at Mount Rushmore. Do you remember, Truman? When Dad was still with us? That was quite a drive, you slept the whole way there. Truman: [looking closer at the old photo of himself as a boy wit...
Artie Fufkin: [after nobody turns up, at an album-signing promotion] You know what I want you to do? Will you do something for me? David St. Hubbins: What? Artie Fufkin: Do me a favor. Just kick my ass, okay? Kick this ass for a man, that's all. Kick...
[Ryan and Natalie arrived at the Hilton hotel where Ryan jumps to the counter to check with his Hilton Honors card; A woman becomes insulted by this] Business Woman: He just waltzes in and cuts in line? Hilton Clerk: We reserve priority assistance fo...
[after they both have sex in Ryan's room; Ryan lays on the floor whilst Alex, naked, lies on the bed] Ryan Bingham: Good call on that towel rack. Alex Goran: I like how you burritoed me in the sofa cushions. Ryan Bingham: I was improvising. Alex Gora...
Bowtie Driver: Me and the bookkeeper are walking out of here, getting into a car, and driving away. Or else he dies! He dies! And you ain't got nothing! You got five seconds to make up your minds! Ness: You got him? George Stone: Yeah, I got him. Bow...
Russell: [after Muntz takes Kevin] You gave away Kevin. You just... gave her away Carl Fredricksen: This is none of my concern. I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF THIS. Dug: Master, it's alright. Carl Fredricksen: I AM NOT YOUR MASTER! AND YOU DIDN'T SHOW UP, N...
Chris: Promise me, Damien. Promise me you won't bury me next to him? [points to Sir John] Damien: The chapel. Do you remember, on the way up? Do you remember? Chris: Yeah. Damien: In there. Chris: Tell Teddy I'm sorry. I'm scared, Damien. Damien: [si...
Owen: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave! Duncan: What? Owen: Yeah. You're going to have to take off. We're getting complaints. You're having way too much fun. It's making everyone uncomfortable. Duncan: Okay. [he gets up to leave] Owen: H...
Bill O'Brien: The Hell with the Union! There's plenty of tramps in town, all volunteers. I'm not worried. To get that bonus, they'll carry the entire charge on their backs. Bradley: You mean you're gonna put those bums to work? Bill O'Brien: Yes, Mr....
Withnail: [Withnail sees Marwood eating some brownish fluid out of a bowl with a spoon] You've got soup. Why didn't I get any soup? Marwood: Coffee. Withnail: Why don't you use a cup like any other human being? Marwood: Why don't you wash up occasion...
Uncle Monty: The older order changeth, yielding place to new. God fulfils himself in many ways. And soon, I suppose, I shall be swept away by some vulgar little tumour. Oh, my boys, my boys, we're at the end of an age. We live in a land of weather fo...
[as they all observe the subway station] Ajax: Come on, what kind of chickenshit crap is this. Cochise: Yeah, come on? We're here, what are we waiting for? Fox: The train would help! Unless you wanna go up there and get jacked on an open platform. Co...
Swan: If you get separated, make it to the platform at Union Square. That's where we change trains. Ajax: I only got one question. Who named you leader? I got just as much right to take over as you. Fox: It was Cleon's choice, Swan's war chief. Ajax:...
[Bongo catches Eddie spying on Jessica] Bongo: What do you think you're doing, chump? Eddie Valiant: Who are you callin' a chump, chimp? [Picks up Eddie and carries him to the backstage door] Bongo: GRRRR! [Throws Eddie into the garbage] Eddie Valian...
Jordan Belfort: On a daily basis I consume enough drugs to sedate Manhattan, Long Island, and Queens for a month. I take Quaaludes 10-15 times a day for my "back pain", Adderall to stay focused, Xanax to take the edge off, pot to mellow me out, cocai...
Mark Hanna: You gotta stay relaxed. Do you jerk off? Jordan Belfort: Do I jerk off? Yeah. Mark Hanna: How many times a week? Jordan Belfort: Like um... three, three or four times maybe. Mark Hanna: All right, pump those numbers up, those are rookie n...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
Dan Dreiberg: So I've been thinking, I feel we have an obligation to our fraternity... I think we oughta spring Rorshach. Laurie Juspeczyk: What? Dan Dreiberg: Someone set him up. This whole cancer thing with Jon, it just doesn't make sense. You didn...
George: You take the trouble to construct a civilization, to build a society based on the principles of... of principle. You make government and art and realize that they are, must be, both the same. You bring things to the saddest of all points, to ...
