It's been a fascinating thing because we didn't really know how to write when we started South Park at all. It's been like, we've just sort of grown up a bit and it's amazing to just see how, if you take Butters and Cartman and put them in any scene,...
Basically, we used to have a rule at 'Saturday Night Live' that you're not allowed to bring up 'The Simpsons' at the rewrite table, because 'The Simpsons' has done every joke there is. Every week there would be guys going, 'The Simpsons did that.' I ...
Stan: We're "La Resistance," we want to save Terrance and Phillip and stop the war and stuff. The Mole: I can't help you. I'm grounded in my room for the next three days. Kyle: So are we. Our parents think we're home right now. Stan: Why are you grou...
Cartman: You should've seen Kyle when his mom showed up. He was scared out of his mind. Kyle: Shut up, Cartman! Cartman: No dude, I'd be scared too, your mom is a fucking bitch. Kyle: Don't call my mom a bitch, you fat fuck! Cartman: Don't call me fa...
Eric Cartman: Mom, there's someone at the door. [No reply] Eric Cartman: Mom, I said there's someone at the door! Mrs. Cartman: Coming, hun. Eric Cartman: [as Liane walks past] Ay, I can't see the TV! Mrs. Cartman: Oh, look Eric, It's your little fri...
I haven't been to Tasmania. I haven't been to the South Pole, and I haven't been to the North Pole. I want to see the polar bear migration before there are no polar bears. I want to see Glacier National Park before the glacier melts.
A lot of people don't realize this, but probably the one person that gets made fun of in 'South Park' more than anybody is my dad. Stan's father, Randy - my dad's name is Randy - that's my drawing of my dad; that's me doing my dad's voice. That is ju...
And what could be a hotter ticket than the improbable triumph of 'The Book of Mormon,' the musical-comedy moon shot of the season? Its creators, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, of Comedy Central's 'South Park,' are the most unlikely Rodgers and Hammerste...
How many times have you been watching an episode of 'South Park' and thought, 'I'd like to be able to watch this on my television while hooked into my mobile device, which is being controlled by my tablet device which is hooked into my oven, all whil...
Satan: Saddam, I need to talk to you Saddam Hussein: Ah, you'd better get packing, bitch, we're running out of time. Satan: [sighs] sometimes you can love someone very much, but still know they aren't right for you. Saddam Hussein: What the *fuck* ar...
Jurassic Park Tour Voice: Welcome to Jurassic Park.
Parking Attendant: You can't park your car here. Raoul Duke: Why not? Is this not a reasonable place to park? Parking Attendant: Reasonable? You're on a sidewalk! This is the sidewalk!
[person speaking German on "cliteris" website] Kyle: Dude, it's a lady getting pooed on! Stan: Whoa! Is it Cartman's mom? Cartman: Oh, very funny! Kyle: Hey! It IS Cartman's mom! Mrs. Cartman: [man speaking German on computer] All righty then! Cartma...
Chef: [singing] Everything worked out what a happy end. Americans and Canadians are friends again. So let's all join hands and knock oppression down. Cartman, Kyle, Stan: Don't you know our little lives are now complete? Mrs. Cartman, Sheila Brofl...
Yellowstone, of all the national parks, is the wildest and most universal in its appeal... Daily new, always strange, ever full of change, it is Nature's wonder park. It is the most human and the most popular of all parks. -Yellowstone Park for Your ...
Guess what the Redskins have? You know, I take the bus to the games, we park in the parking lot where the visiting team parks. So I go out there after the game and they have a food truck there! And the guy comes over and he cooks food for the Redskin...
Parallel parking is desirable for two reasons: parked cars create a physical barrier and psychological buffer that protects pedestrians on the sidewalk from moving vehicles; and a rich supply of parallel parking can eliminate the need for parking lot...
[trying to get to one of Simon's destinations on time] Zeus: I told you the Park Drive is always jammed. John McClane: I didn't say "Park Drive." [McClane turns the cab and drives through the park] John McClane: I said "through the park."
I don't think the government should be in the trailer-park business. I don't think they know how to run a trailer park.
We don't have unions in South Carolina because we don't need unions in South Carolina.
I used to drive a parking lot, and I’d always park it directly under somebody’s car.
