[Dutch is talking to the General] Dutch: So why don't you use the regular army? What do you need us for? Dillon: 'Cause some damn fool accused you of being the best. [Dutch turns around and sees Dillon sitting in a chair in another room] Dutch: Dillo...
Patrick: [mimicking his shop teacher] The prick punch is not a toy! I learned that back in 'Nam in '68. 'Callahan,' Sergeant said, 'you put down that prick punch and go kill some gooks!' And you know what happened? That prick punch killed my best fri...
Dr. Nelson Guggenheim: We're putting you on what we call sudden death academic probation. Max Fischer: And what does that entail? Dr. Nelson Guggenheim: It entails that if you fail another class, you'll be asked to leave Rushmore. Max Fischer: In oth...
Pimp Lester: You want to study for your G.E.D.? Here. [Lester repeatedly smashes Divina's head with her book, which causes her to break his headlight] Pimp Lester: [forcing her head into the broken headlight] Look what you done to my fucking ride, bi...
[first lines] Narrator: [on television] Although each of the world's countries would like to dispute this fact, we French know the truth: the best food in the world is made in France. The best food in France is made in Paris. And the best food in Par...
[General Turgenson's phone rings in the war room] General "Buck" Turgidson: Hello... [whispering] General "Buck" Turgidson: I told you never to call me here, don't you know where I am?... Well look, baby, I c-, I *can't* talk to you now... my preside...
[Tony is on a payphone describing the botched drug deal involving Hector the Toad] Tony Montana: [into the phone] Yeah, it was a setup. Bunch of cowboys. Somebody fucked up somewhere. Fuckin' Columbians. They never wanted to make the sale. They only ...
Jack: I might be in love with another woman. Miles Raymond: In love? Really? 24 hours with some wine-pourer chick and you're fucking in love? Come on! And you're gonna give up everything? Jack: Here's what I'm thinking: you and me, we move up here, w...
[Shrek sneaks up on a mob about to storm his swamp] Villager 1: There's his lair... let's get him! Villager 2: Do you know what that thing could do? It'll grind your bones for its bread! Shrek: Well, actually, that would be a giant. Now ogres, oh, th...
[after Shane enters the bar and orders asks for a soda pop, Chris tries to bully him] Chris Calloway: Well, what'll it be? Lemon, strawberry or lilac, sodbuster? Shane: You speakin' to me? Chris Calloway: I don't see nobody else standin' there. [thro...
[Lamia is about to cut out Yvaine's heart] Tristan: Yvaine, hold me tight and think of home. [Tristan lights his Babylon candle. They escape, but end up on a cloud in the middle of nowhere] Tristan: What the hell did you do? Yvaine: What did *I* do? ...
Howard: Say, answer me this one, will you? Why is gold worth some twenty bucks an ounce? Flophouse Bum: I don't know. Because it's scarce. Howard: A thousand men, say, go searchin' for gold. After six months, one of them's lucky: one out of a thousan...
Willy Wonka: Well, fortunately, small boys are extremely springy and elastic. So I think we'll put him in my special taffy-pulling machine. That should do the trick. [to an Oompa Loompa] Willy Wonka: To the taffy-pulling room. You'll find the boy in ...
[after buying his used car, Burt says he needs some wheels to build a trailer for the motorcycle] Fernando: Well, I got a couple wheels in the shop I could let you have, but first you got to do me a favor. Burt Munro: Oh, well just say the word. [cut...
Jordan Belfort: People say shit... I mean like, you married your cousin or some stupid shit. Donnie Azoff: Yeah, my wife is my cousin or whatever, but it's not like what you think. Jordan Belfort: Is she like, a first cousin? Donnie Azoff: Her father...
Bill Sampson: The Theatuh, the Theatuh - what book of rules says the Theater exists only within some ugly buildings crowded into one square mile of New York City? Or London, Paris or Vienna? Listen, junior. And learn. Want to know what the Theater is...
[Alvy is having sex with Annie] Alvy Singer: Hey, is something wrong? Annie Hall: No, why? Alvy Singer: I don't know. It's like you're removed. [a ghost of Annie rises from herself, and sits in a chair to watch] Annie Hall: No, I'm fine. Alvy Singer:...
Boon: Where are you going? We just got here. Katy: No, Boon, you just got here. I've been downstairs for an hour entertaining some kid from Pig's Knuckle, Arkansas. Boon: Umm - maybe we could drive up to your folks' place this weekend. Katy: Oh, fabu...
Willard: My mission is to make it up into Cambodia. There's a Green Beret Colonel up there who's gone insane. I'm supposed to kill him. Chef: What? Oh, that's typical! Shit! Fuckin' Vietnam mission! I'm short, and we gotta go up there so you can kill...
Batman: [has laid a snare-trap which yanks Flass by his leg 70 feet into the air] Where were the other drugs going? Flass: I never knew. I don't know. I swear to God... Batman: Swear to *me*! [He rapidly lowers a screaming Flass and then yanks him ba...
Col. Robert Stout: Could you get a message down to XXXth Corps on that dingus? Radio Operator: Yes, sir. Uh, we just got word from the 82nd up ahead. They captured the Graves bridge completely intact! Col. Robert Stout: Aw, that's terrrific. Except X...
