Quotes of: Some Keyword

Socialism provides safety in numbers. And that’s OK, if you don’t mind trading your name—your identity and individualism—for a number.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I got tapped for the job position. As soon as I felt it on my shoulder, I turned around and my boss told me.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Contribute to No More Lies Dot Org. Every dollar you donate will bring us 75 cents closer to the truth.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I made her late, so she made me dinner. And by late I mean pregnant. And by dinner I mean marry her.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

The only thing I have left to remember her by is the scent of her perfume. I just broke into her car and stole the bottle.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

How to get money: earn it, steal it, borrow it, beg for it, or inherit it. So, who do I have to kill to get rich?

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Wealth—one billion, two billion, what’s the difference? The difference is one billion—the same difference as flat broke, like me, and one billion.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Ma’am, I can take either you or your purse, but I can’t take both. And honestly, I’d rather take your purse.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I’m so silent I can hardly hear myself think. But that’s why I bought the scissors and the condom.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Male or female, if my name were either Don or Dawn, I’d be up at sunrise to celebrate the glory that is me.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Mr. Shit gives politicians a good name. It’s the rest of the politicians who give Mr. Shit a bad name.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Boy, when Grandma Wrinklebottom comes to town, you’d better hide your underwear. I know I’ll be hiding my political perspectives.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

It’s a fact I want to own a factory that makes up facts and figures, and I figure to make a fortune selling to politicians.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I’m on a shoestring budget, which means I don’t have any extra money to buy the surrounding shoes to even lace up.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

The fastest I’ve ever fallen in love is 17 miles per hour. But I was safe, because I was wearing a bicycle helmet at the time.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

After a long day of screaming at the trees, I smell like a skyscraper. Would you care to ride on my elevator shaft?

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I feel like I’m walking around in a fog. Orafoura doesn’t call me Mr. Mist for nothing.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Not only did I not win the sweepstakes, but I didn’t even bother to enter. I feel discriminated against.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

I can do a week in a weekend. That’s not how efficient I am, that’s how little I work.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

Hemingway suggested you write the truest sentence you know. I say write the falsest one you don’t know. This is fiction.

99 Cents For Some Nonsense

It's the wrong way. She's farther away from the door now. It occurs to me that some people only have book smarts.

Anna Dressed in Blood