Rusty: Tell me this is not about her, or I am walking. I am walking off this job right now. Danny: Who? Rusty: Tess. Terry Benedict. Tell me this is not about screwing the guy who's screwing your wife. Danny: Ex-wife. Rusty: Tell me. Danny: It's not ...
Peter Gibbons: The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care. Bob Porter: Don't... don't care? Peter Gibbons: It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my ass off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see ...
Father Cavanaugh: [in church] Taking your appeal to a higher authority? Rudy: I'm desperate. If I don't get in next semester, it's over. Notre Dame doesn't accept senior transfers. Father Cavanaugh: Well, you've done a hell of a job kid, chasing down...
Jack Ridley: [talking to TV] Attaboy, Gus! [talking to Yeager] Jack Ridley: Pull that stuff on flight test, it's all over for him. I say he screwed the pooch, partner. Plain and simple. Chuck Yeager: Yeah, well, sometimes you get a pooch that can't b...
Shrek: Princess, I was SENT to rescue you by Lord Farquad, okay? HE's the one that wants to marry you. Princess Fiona: Well, why didn't he come to rescue me? Shrek: Good question! You can ask him that when we get there... Princess Fiona: But I'm supp...
Roger: Here's a joke, boy. One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to shit, and lands in...
Keaton: Hey, uh... friend of mine in New York tells me that you know, that you knew Spook Hollis. Redfoot the Fence: The way I hear it, you did time with old Spook. Good man, wasn't he? I used to run dope for him. Too bad he got shivved. Keaton: Yeah...
Angelo: So who's your client, Mr. Detective-to-the-Stars? Chilly Willy? Or Screwy Squirrel? Dolores: What'll it be? Angelo: I'll have a beer, doll. So what happened, huh? Somebody kidnapped Dinky Doodle? Dolores: Cut it out, Angelo. Angelo: No, wait ...
Jesse James: [Jesse has given Bob a gun as a gift] You know what John Newman Edwards once wrote about me? He said I didn't trust two men in ten thousand and was even cautious around them. The government's sort of run me ragged. I'm going the long way...
Jake: [to Sister Mary Stigmata] Five grand? No problem, we'll have it for you in the morning. Let's go, Elwood. Sister Mary Stigmata: No, no! I will not take your filthy stolen money! Jake: Well then... I guess you're really up Shit Creek. [Sister Ma...
[answering the phone] Middle-Aged Marty: Hey, Needles. Needles: So, did you take a look at that little business proposal of mine? Middle-Aged Marty: I don't know, Needles. Needles: What are you afraid of? If this thing works it'll solve all your fina...
Jack Twist: You know what, friend? This is a goddamn bitch of an unsatisfactory situation. You used to come down so easy, now it's like seein' the Pope. Ennis Del Mar: Jack, I gotta work. I mean in them earlier days I just quit the job. You forget wh...
The problem with me is that I cannot focus when she is on my mind. I can’t. I probably will make a mistake when writing that paper and will start writing everything I feel about her—the professor will be very happy with that, I am sure. Oh well, ...
Many of us attend a few yoga classes and find that we like the glimpse of another way of life that yoga offers. We are delighted by the way we feel after class and we are pleasantly surprised as certain behaviors start to fall away. Perhaps we no lon...
Amy: I even made a new friend. I have a friend and the absurd thing is an operating system. Charles left her behind but she's totally amazing. She's... She's so smart. She doesn't just see things is black or white. She sees things in this whole gray ...
I say this because all religions, accurately understood, will take away your fear of not being enough. I believe there is a way to understand the tenets of your religion, right now, that will take away your fear and make you feel loved and safe. The ...
Dear 2600: I think my girlfriend has been cheating on me and I wanted to know if I could get her password to Hotmail and AOL. I am so desperate to find out. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks. And this is yet another popular category of letter we ...
Pure, unadulterated, consistent love for God and pure, unadulterated, consistent love for others is the summation of all the law God has given us in both the Old and New Testaments. Of course, the problem is that we never obey these simple commands. ...
Reading is a sage way to bump up against life. Reading may be an escape, but it is not an escape from my own life and problems. It is an escape from the narrow boundaries of being only me. Reading in some wonderful ways helps me find out who I am. ...
The main reason I became a teacher is that I like being the first one to introduce kids to words and music and people and numbers and concepts and idea that they have never heard about or thought about before. I like being the first one to tell them ...
A man once asked me ... how I managed in my books to write such natural conversation between men when they were by themselves. Was I, by any chance, a member of a large, mixed family with a lot of male friends? I replied that, on the contrary, I was ...
