Jonathan Mardukas: [impersonating an FBI agent] Would you describe exactly what the last man who passed a $20 bill to you looked like? Bar Cashier: Thirty, tall... Jonathan Mardukas: About 6 feet? Bar Cashier: [shakes head] Six-five. Jonathan Marduka...
Fred Gailey: Your Honor, every one of these letters is addressed to Santa Claus. The Post Office has delivered them. Therefore the Post Office Department, a branch of the Federal Governent, recognizes this man Kris Kringle to be the one and only Sant...
Hawkeye Pierce: All right! I demand an explanation. Hawkeye Pierce: Someone get that dirty old man out of this operating theater. Col. Wallace C. Merril: [taken aback] Dirty old man? I'm Colonel Merrill. Hawkeye Pierce: I don't care if you're Jack Ar...
O-Dog: Hey man, I was gonna tell you somethin' 'fore we went up in the house, man. Caine: What's up? O-Dog: Oh nigga, guess what? Word got back about them little marks who jacked you and Harold. I know were they be kickin' it at. Down with a 187? Cai...
Ed Crane: [narrating] There they were. All going about their business. It seemed like I knew a secret, a bigger one even than what had really happened to Big Dave. Something none of them knew. Like I had made it to the outside somehow, and they were ...
Ed Crane: I went to see a woman who was supposed to have powers of communicating with those who had "passed across" as she called it. She said that people who had passed across were picky about who they communicated with, not like most people you run...
[Doniphon has just faced down Valance in the diner] Tom Doniphon: Well, now; I wonder what scared 'em off? Dutton Peabody: [poking fun at Stoddard for his idealism] You know what scared 'em - the spectacle of law and order here, risin' up out of the ...
High Pockets: Well, Mr. Professor. I thought you left town. What are you doin' out here? Ransom Stoddard: I'm waiting for Liberty Valance. Why doesn't he come out? Kaintuck: Well, th-th-that's n-n-none of our b-b-b-business.
Dutton Peabody: [protesting his nomination to the statehood convention] Good people of Shinbone; I, I'm your conscience, I'm the small voice that thunders in the night, I'm your watchdog who howls against the wolves, I, I'm your father confessor! I -...
Oogie Boogie Man: Ashes to askes and dust to dust! Ohh... I'm feeling weak - with hunger! One more roll o the dice oughta do it! [places the dice in the skull shaker but recieves a pair of ones] Oogie Boogie Man: WHAT? SNAKE-EYES! [strikes the table ...
Inigo Montoya: Do you hear that, Fezzik? That is the sound of ultimate suffering. My heart made that sound when Rugen slaughtered my father. The man in black makes it now. Fezzik: The man in black? Inigo Montoya: His true love is marrying another ton...
Nice Guy Eddie: Ain't that a sad sight, Daddy, the man walks in the prison a white man, walks out talkin' like a fuckin' nigger. You know what, I think it's all that black semen been pumped up your ass so far, now it's backed into your fuckin brain, ...
Alan-A-Dale: Man, oh man! That Prince John sure made good as threat! And his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation, believe me. Taxes, taxes, taxes. Why he taxed the whole heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham, and if you co...
Man in a Punt: Great sport, this! Woman in a Punt: What? Man in a Punt: I said, it's great sport, this punting! [Their punt passes another one beached behind some reeds, where James and Sylvia are making out] James Bond: I couldn't agree with him mor...
Charlie: [talking to the woman who answers the door] I'm sorry ma'am, I lied to you. I'm very sorry about that. That man right there is my brother and if he doesn't get to watch 'People's Court' in about 30 seconds, he's gonna throw a fit right here ...
[In a phone booth] Raymond: It's definitely very small in here. [Tries to leave] Charlie: Small, and safe. Don't wanna miss the party. You know that, there's a party in your honor Ray. When we get to LA, there'll be a little custody hearing. Lawyers ...
Jack Lauderdale: So Ray, we got to talk about your name, man. Robinson. I mean, Sugar Ray got to Robinson franchise all sewed up. So I'm thinking we go with your middle name: Charles. As in "Ray Charles." Ray Charles: I don't care what you call me, m...
Dianne: I don't think he'd leave us, Davs. David: Wouldn't he? Lizzy, how can you put your faith in a man you spectacularly binned for being unreliable? A man whose idea of a romantic nightspot and an impenetrable fortress are the same thing? It's......
Benny Rodriguez: Man, you think too much! I bet you get straight A's and shit! Scotty Smalls: No, I got a B once. Well, actually it was an A minus but it should have been a B. Benny Rodriguez: Man, this is baseball, you gotta stop thinking! Just have...
Hank Mitchell: When I was still just a kid, I remember my father telling me what he thought that it took for a man to be happy. Simple things, really. A wife he loves. A decent job. Friends and neighbors who like and respect him. And for a while ther...
Sheila Broflovski: Kyle you are grounded for two weeks. Sharon Marsh: You too Stan. Mrs. Cartman: And you're grounded for three weeks Eric. Cartman: Hey! Why am I grounded more that's fuckin' bullshit! Mrs. Cartman: What, what, what? What was that wo...