Karen Holmes: I never knew it could be like this! Nobody ever kissed me the way you do. Sergeant Milton Warden: Nobody? Karen Holmes: No, nobody. Sergeant Milton Warden: Not even one? Out of all the men you've been kissed by? Karen Holmes: [giggling]...
Staff Sergeant William James: I want my five bucks back, buddy. Beckham: Five dollars for what, man? You crazy now? Staff Sergeant William James: Yeah. The DVD you sold me was crap. Beckham: You crazy, man. That's impossible. It's Hollywood special e...
Major John Reisman: What do you think, Sergeant? Sergeant Clyde Bowren: I think you'll do just fine, sir. Major John Reisman: [emphatically] Don't give me that! I said what do you think? Sergeant Clyde Bowren: I think the first chance one of those lo...
Convenience Store Clerk: [Powell with an armload of Twinkies] I thought you guys just ate doughnuts. Sergeant Al Powell: Heh. They're for my wife. Convenience Store Clerk: [sarcastically] Yeah. Sergeant Al Powell: She's pregnant. Convenience Store Cl...
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What's your excuse? Private Cowboy: Sir, excuse for what, sir? Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I'm asking the fucking questions here, private! Do you understand? Private Cowboy: Sir, yes, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Well, thank...
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Where the hell are you from anyway, private? Private Cowboy: Sir, Texas, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Holy dog shit! Texas? Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy, and you don't look much like a steer to me...
[Pvt. Joker is doing pull-ups. Hartman counts them off] Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: One for the Commandant! One for the Corps! Come on Joker, pull! Pull! [Pvt. Joker can't complete another pull-up] Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: I guess the Corps don't get ...
Sergeant Calhoun: Your face is still red, you might want to hit it with your hammer again. Fix-It Felix: Oh, that ain't blunt force trauma, ma'am. It's just the honeyglow in my cheeks. You know, you are one dynamite gal. Calhoun's Fiancee: [At the ar...
Lt. Col. Bill Cage: Master Sergeant Farell, you're an American. Master Sergeant Farell: *No,* sir. I'm from *Kentucky.*
Charley - Chicago Policeman: Where are we goin'? Sergeant Flamm - Chicago Policeman: Airport. Charley - Chicago Policeman: For what? Sergeant Flamm - Chicago Policeman: Orders.
May Morrison: Can I do anything for you, Sergeant? Sergeant Howie: No, I doubt it, seeing you're all raving mad!
Sergeant: Put your gun down! Max: Get back put your hands down! Look,I gotta go! Sergeant: Put down the gun! Max: Stop moving! Stop moving. When did this become a negotiation? [Max makes the sergeant cuff himself to the crashed cab] Max: Clap your ha...
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What's your name, scumbag? Private Snowball: Sir, Private Brown, sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Bullshit! From now on you're Private Snowball. Do you like that name? Private Snowball: Sir, yes, sir! Gunnery Sergeant Hartman:...
Staff Sergeant William James: [to Iraqi street kid] I wanna buy another DVD. But, if it's shaky - look at me - out of focus, or any way not 100%, I'm gonna chop off your head with a dull knife. How do you feel about - I'm just kidding, I'm just kiddi...
Sergeant McCaskey: You know, Roger, you are way behind the times. The guys of the 80s aren't tough. They are sensitive people. Show a little emotion to a woman and shit like that. I think I'm an '80s man... Roger Murtaugh: How do you figure? Sergeant...
Sergeant Howie: What religion can they possibly be learning jumping over bonfires? Lord Summerisle: Parthenogenesis. Sergeant Howie: What? Lord Summerisle: Literally, as Miss Rose would doubtless say in her assiduous way, reproduction without sexual ...
Sergeant Prendergast: Lucky you caught me. Motorcycle Cop: I am? Sergeant Prendergast: Yeah. Today's my last day as a cop. Motorcycle Cop: Lucky me.
No! Wait! I've got a better idea..." "Your ideas tend to result in unnecessary violence, Sergeant Schlock." "And your point is..." "Let's broaden the definition of 'necessary'." -Sergeant Schlock & Captain Tagon
Sergeant Prendergast: Let's meet a couple of police officers. They are all good guys. Bill Foster: I'm the bad guy? Sergeant Prendergast: Yeah. Bill Foster: How did that happen?
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: How tall are you, private? Private Cowboy: Sir, five-foot-nine, sir. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high!
Sergeant Major: Is there something YOU'D all rather be doing than marching about the square? You'd all rather be at the pictures, I suppose. [Everyone agrees] Sergeant Major: Well, off you go.
