Terence: We wrote one last night outside the mini mart. Morris called it "Stuart Drives A Comfortable Car" and then like in country songs, you know, in parentheses it says "There's Usually Someone in the Trunk." And, and um, I came up with a tune jus...
Charles Bushman: Now... On the third day, I washed her. She wasn't too clean. I got all the right spots. She's the only one I kept for a certain amount of time, because I got a real short attention span. Now, I can't say she enjoyed her stay, but tha...
Cmdr. William Riker: We finished our first sensor sweep of the neutral zone. Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Oh, fascinating. Twenty particles of space dust per cubic meter, 52 ultraviolet radiation spikes, and a class-2 comet. Well, this is certainly worth...
Princess Fiona: [after Shrek and Donkey rescue her] The battle is won. You may remove your helmet, good Sir Knight. Shrek: Uh, no... Princess Fiona: Why not? Shrek: I... have helmet hair. Princess Fiona: Please. I would'st look upon the face of my re...
[Discussing the effects of the Genesis torpedo] McCoy: Dear Lord. You think we're intelligent enough to... suppose... what if this thing were used where life already exists? Spock: It would destroy such life in favor of its new matrix. McCoy: Its "ne...
Maria: Reverend Mother, I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself. -The hills were beckoning and... the sky was so blue today... and everything was so green and fragrant, I had to be a part of it. The Untersberg led me higher like it wanted me to go through ...
Mickey: The deal was you bought it like you saw it. Hey, look, I've helped you as much as I'm going to help you. See that car? Just use it for you're not welcome anymore. You should fuck off now while you still got the legs to carry you. Gorgeous Geo...
Smalls: I was gonna put the ball back. Squints: But it was signed by Babe Ruth! Smalls: Yeah, you keep telling me that! Who is she? Ham Porter: WHAT? WHAT? Kenny: The sultan of swat! Bertram: The king of crash! Timmy: The colossus of clout! Tommy: Th...
Ham Porter: [mimicking Babe Ruth with a cigar in his mouth; can't understand him] Check this out. I'm the Great Bambino. Sandlot Kids: What? Ham Porter: [still can't understand him] I'm the Great Bambino! Sandlot Kids: What? Ham Porter: [takes cigar ...
Sweeney Todd: Noooooo! Would no one have mercy on her? Mrs. Lovett: So it's you. Benjamin Barker Sweeney Todd: Where's Lucy? Where's my wife? Mrs. Lovett: She poisoned herself, arsenic from the apothecary round the corner, I tried to stop her, but sh...
Leonard 'Bones' McCoy: Permission to speak freely, sir? Spock: I welcome it. Leonard 'Bones' McCoy: Do you? OK, then. Are you out of your Vulcan mind? Are you making a logical choice, sending Kirk away? Probably. But, the right one? You know, back ho...
Henry Gatewood: [clutching valise with embezzled funds] I can't get over the impertinence of that young lieutenant. I'll make it warm for that shake-tail! I'll report him to Washington - we pay taxes to the government and what do we get? Not even pro...
[Yvaine is having a bath and Tristan surprises her] Tristan: Excuse me. Yvaine: [surprised] Oh! Tristan: I think you're in my bath. Yvaine: Close your eyes! Tristan: [turns around and laughs] Honestly I'm not looking. Here, I'll turn away. [he laughs...
Han Solo: Han Solo. I'm captain of the Millennium Falcon. Chewie here tells me you're lookin' for passage to the Alderaan system? Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi: Yes indeed, if it's a fast ship. Han Solo: Fast ship? You've never heard of the Millennium Falcon? B...
Randy: [Frank and Charlie have arrived unexpected at Frank's brother's house for Thanksgiving. Randy opens the door and the smile on his face disappears] Yes? Lt. Col. Frank Slade: Yes! Who is this? Randy: It's Randy. Lt. Col. Frank Slade: Randy? You...
Plainview: [Eli is intending to bless the well] I thank you all so much for visiting with us at this time. I've had the pleasure of meeting some of you, and I hope, very much in the months to come, I'll be able to visit with each and every one of you...
Roger: Here's a joke, boy. One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to shit, and lands in...
Tucker: [Dale is attracted to one of the college co-eds at the gas station, but hesitates to try to go talk to her] She's just human. Why don't you go over and talk to her? Dale: Talk to her? What... What in the world would I say? Tucker: I don't kno...
Mattie Ross: You never told me you had a wife. Rooster Cogburn: Oh, well, I didn't have her long. My friends was a pack of river rats and she didn't crave their society so she up and left me and went back to her first husband who was clerkin' in a ha...
[Rooster, LaBoeuf and Mattie are taking the bodies back to McAlester's] Rooster Cogburn: [to LaBoeuf] What outfit were you with during the war? LaBoeuf: Shreveport, with Kirby Smith. Rooster Cogburn: Oh, I mean what side were you on? LaBoeuf: I serve...
First Sgt. Edward Welsh: Hey Witt, who you making trouble for today? Private Witt: What do you mean? First Sgt. Edward Welsh: Well, isn't that what you like to do? Turn left when they say go right. Why are you such a trouble maker Witt? Private Witt:...
