Theo: [as the SWAT Team closes in] [over the CB] Theo: All right, listen up guys. 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except... the four assholes coming in the rear in standard two-by-two cover fo...
Michael: I'll tell ya one thing, if I find out my life had to end up being in the mountains, it'd be all right, but it has to be in your mind. Nick: What? One shot? Michael: Two is pussy.
[examining one of the gauntlets for his new and improved Batsuit, Bruce presses a button, and the spikes are launched across the room, narrowly missing Fox before they bury themselves in the wall] Lucius Fox: Perhaps you should read the instructions ...
Tyler Durden: All right, if the applicant is young, tell him he's too young. Old, too old. Fat, too fat. If the applicant then waits for three days without food, shelter, or encouragement he may then enter and begin his training.
Mr. Lee: Take the money. Bill Foster: You think I'm a thief? Oh, you see, I'm not the thief. I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a *stinking* soda! You're the thief. I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer.
Nick: Fuck you. Who the fuck are you? Are you fucking with me? You're fucking with me! Bill Foster: I am just disagreeing with you! In America, we have the freedom of speech, the right to disagree! Nick: Fuck you and your freedom.
Lt. Weinberg: You've heard her. The girl sat here, pointed and said, "Pa." She did. She said, "Pa." Kaffee: She was pointing at a mailbox, Sam. Lt. Weinberg: That's right. She was pointing as if to say, "Pa, look, a mailbox."
Ninny Threadgoode: Idgie and her friend Ruth ran the Whistle Stop Cafe. Idgie was a character, all right. But how anybody could have thought she murdered that man is beyond me. Evelyn Couch: I beg your pardon?
[last lines of part one] Hilts: [after Ives is killed] Sir, let me know the exact information you need. I'm going out tonight. Bartlett: Right. [to Danny] Bartlett: Open up Harry. We dig. Around the clock.
Angie Gennaro: They told me what happened. I'm proud of you. That man killed a child. He had no right to live. Patrick Kenzie: You're proud of me? Angie Gennaro: Of course I am. You did what you had to do.
[Chunk and Sloth come across the out-of-control pipes] Chunk: Yeah. Mikey's been through here, all right. [Sloth grabs some pipes and pushes them up. He hears a car crash, a woman scream and sirens] Sloth: Uh-oh.
Louie: It's a pigeon. It must be a carrier pigeon or whatever. Old Consigliere: Passenger pigeon! They've been extinct since 1914! Sonny Valerio: Am I fucking dreaming here or what? All right, Louie, forget about the bird, okay?
Ron Weasley: Oh my God. What am I gonna do? My wife's all alone downstairs! Harry Potter: Ron, you don't have a wife. Ron Weasley: Right.
Hermione: [after Hagrid gives Ron Scabbers back] I think you owe someone an apology. Ron: Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know. Hermione: [annoyed] I meant me!
Dain: Good morning. How are we all? I have a wee proposition, if you don't mind giving me a few moments of your time. Would you consider... JUST SODDING OFF! All ye, right now!
Marley: You live down the street from me right?, You know anytime you see you can always say hello, you don't have to be afraid. A lot of stuff has been said about me, none of it's true.
Lynda: You want a beer? Bob: Yeah. Lynda: Is that all you can say? Bob: Yeah. Lynda: Go get me a beer! Bob: I thought you were gonna get me one? Lynda: Yeah? Bob: I'll be right back. Don't get dressed!
Laurie: [in the Wallace house, and noises are coming from upstairs] All right you meatheads, joke's over. [silence] Laurie: Come on, Annie. That's enough. [more silence] Laurie: It's most definitely stopped being funny, now cut it out! You'll be sorr...
Stu Price: Here's something I would like to remind you two of: our best friend Doug is probably face down in a ditch right now with a meth head butt-fucking his corpse! Alan Garner: That's highly unlikely.
Father Dominic Moran: [offering Sands a cigarette] Bit of a break from smokin' the Bible, eh? Bobby Sands: [agrees] Father Dominic Moran: Anyone work out which book is the best smoke? Bobby Sands: We only smoke the Lamentations. A right miserable cig...
Horace Slughorn: [in regard to returning to Hogwarts] All right, I'll do it! But I want Professor Merrythought's office, not that water closet I had before. And I want a raise, these are mad times we live in. MAD!
