Jack: I might be in love with another woman. Miles Raymond: In love? Really? 24 hours with some wine-pourer chick and you're fucking in love? Come on! And you're gonna give up everything? Jack: Here's what I'm thinking: you and me, we move up here, w...
Penny Escher: [sitting on bench under an umbrella] May I ask what we're doing out here? Kay Eiffel: [sitting next to Penny without an umbrella] We're imagining car wrecks. Penny Escher: I see. And we can't imagine car wrecks inside? Kay Eiffel: No. D...
[eyeing the "KEEP OUT" signs surrounding Shrek's home] Donkey: I guess you don't, uh... entertain much. Shrek: I like my privacy. Donkey: Y'know, I do too. That's another thing we have in common. I hate it when you've got someone in your face, you tr...
Donkey: Oh, now I really see what's going on... Shrek: I don't know what you're talking about... Donkey: Hey, I don't even wanna hear... Look, I'm an animal, I got instincts, and I know you two were diggin' on each other! Shrek: Oh, you're crazy! I'm...
Saavik: Admiral, may I ask you a question? Kirk: What's on your mind, Lieutenant? Saavik: The Kobayashi Maru, sir. Kirk: Are you asking me if we're playing out that scenario now? Saavik: On the test, sir... will you tell me what you did? I would real...
Stan Marsh: Dude, dude, wake up! [Kenny does so and gets dressed] Stan Marsh: Kenny, come on! Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Coming! Stan Marsh: Kenny! The new Terrance and Phillip movie is out! You wanna come with me? Kenny McCormick: Yeah, dude! Come o...
[Arriving back from their first date] Aurora Greenway: Would you like to come in? Garrett Breedlove: I'd rather stick needles in my eyes. Aurora Greenway: Everything would have been just fine, you know, if you hadn't gotten drunk. I was... I... I jus...
Randolph Duke: [Valentine overhears the Dukes talking in the bathroom] Pay up, Mortimer. I've won the bet. Mortimer Duke: Here, one dollar. Randolph Duke: [chuckling] We took a perfectly useless psychopath like Valentine, and turned him into a succes...
Evey Hammond: What is that you're making? Gordon Deitrich: We call it "eggie in the basket". My mum used to make them. Evey Hammond: This is weird. Gordon Deitrich: What? Evey Hammond: The first morning I was with him, he made me eggs just like this....
Eddie Valiant: [after discovering the flattened Doom getting up and wobbling to his feet] Holy smoke, he's a Toon! Judge Doom: Surprised? Eddie Valiant: Not really. That lame-brained freeway idea could only be cooked up by a Toon. Judge Doom: Not jus...
Jordan Belfort: [Wakes up on plane; finds he is restrained by a seatbelt across his chest] Oh, Jesus Christ. Fuck. Donnie. Donnie this isn't... this isn't funny, you gotta untie me, buddy. Donnie Azoff: I can't untie you! The captain tied you up, he ...
[from deleted scene] Raven: [sees Logan] So Erik was telling the truth. You're really from the future. Hank McCoy: Well, if you kill Trask, there'll be ten more like him. Raven: Well then I'll kill them too, and anyone who comes next! Logan: Let's ju...
Tenoch: How many times did you fuck her? Julio Zapata: Once, we were really wasted Tenoch: When did you do it Julio Zapata: I don't know Tenoch: Tell me when! Julio Zapata: When you went to Lake Tahoe Tenoch: Where was Cecilia? Julio Zapata: She was ...
Jim: Do you know I was thinking? Selena: You were thinking that you'll never hear another piece of original music ever again. You'll never read a book that hasn't already been written or see a film that hasn't already been shot. Jim: Um, that's what ...
Lindsey Brigman: I know how alone you feel... alone in all that cold blackness... but I'm there in the dark with you. Oh Bud you're not alone... Oh, God. You remember that time - you were pretty drunk, you probably don't remember - but the power went...
Boon: Where are you going? We just got here. Katy: No, Boon, you just got here. I've been downstairs for an hour entertaining some kid from Pig's Knuckle, Arkansas. Boon: Umm - maybe we could drive up to your folks' place this weekend. Katy: Oh, fabu...
Patrick Bateman: Did you know that Whitney Houston's debut LP, called simply Whitney Houston had 4 number one singles on it? Did you know that, Christie? Elizabeth: [laughing] You actually listen to Whitney Houston? You own a Whitney Houston CD? More...
Claire Standish: What's your name? John Bender: What's yours? Claire Standish: Claire. John Bender: Claire? Claire Standish: Claire. It's a family name. John Bender: Oh, it's a fat girl's name. Claire Standish: Oh, thank you. John Bender: You're welc...
Celine: The past is the past. It was meant to be that way. Jesse: What, you really believe that? That everything's fated? Celine: Well, you know, the world might be less free than we think. Jesse: Yeah? Celine: Yeah, when given these exact circumstan...
Fs Are "Fabulous" Hey, Mom and Dad! I got my grades! And you'll be thrilled to hear the marks on our report cards are changed around this year. A bunch of kids were telling me this morning on the bus, that they had heard some teachers say that Fs are...
The search began 10 years ago To find a nasty viscous foe They searched in caves and underground But no Bin Laden could be found The President full of seething Calls his Generals to a meeting Have you looked under your noses? Is the question he propo...