[Frank has beaten a horde of America's most-feared world leaders in a conference room and heads for a door] Muammar al-Qaddafi: Hey, who are you? Frank: I'm Lt. Frank Drebin! Police Squad! And don't ever let me catch you guys in America! [the door hi...
Homer: [to John] Dad, I may not be the best, but I come to believe that I got it in me to be somebody in this world. And it's not because I'm so different from you either, it's because I'm the same. I mean, I can be just as hard-headed, and just as t...
The Blue Fairy: You must learn to choose between right and wrong. Pinocchio: Right and wrong? But how will I know? Jiminy Cricket: [watching] How'll he know! The Blue Fairy: [to Pinocchio] Your conscience will tell you. Pinocchio: What's a conscience...
Lorenzo St. DuBois: [singing] And I give a flower to the big fat cop / He takes his club and he beats me up / I give a flower to the garbage man / He stuffs my girl in the garbage can / And I give it to the landlord when the rent comes 'round / He th...
Carla: [after telling Stanley she's pregnant] You didn't mean what you just said, did you? Stanley Goodspeed: When? Carla: Just right now, when you were talking about bringing a child into the world, and having it be an act of cruelty. Stanley Goodsp...
Little John: [singing] All the world will sing of an English king a thousand years from now / And not because he's passed some law or had that lofty brow / While bonnie good King Richard leads the Great Crusade he's on / We'll all have to slave away ...
Joe Gillis: [narrating] Come think of it, the whole place seemed to have been stricken with the kind of creeping paralysis... out of beat with the rest of the world... crumbling apart in slow motion. There was a tennis court... or rather the ghost of...
P.L. Travers: My point is that, unlike yourself, Mary Poppins is the very enemy of whimsy and sentiment. She's truthful. She doesn't sugarcoat the darkness in the world that these children will eventually, inevitably come to know. She prepares them f...
Ed: See? You don't need Liz to have a good time. Shaun: Oh, don't, man. Ed: No! Go ahead, look at me. Can I just say one more thing? I'm not gonna say, you know, there's plenty more fish in the sea. I'm not going to say if you love her, let her go. A...
Shaun: [looking behind Ed's shoulder at the old woman in the pub] All right, what about her, then? Ed: [looking back at her, then to Shaun] Ooooooh... cockacidal maniac. Ex-porn star. She's done it all. They say she starred in the world's first inter...
Mike Erganian: What is the subject of your book? Non fiction? Miles Raymond: Uh, no. It's... it's a novel. Fiction. Yes. Although there is quite a bit from my own life... so I suppose that, technically some of it is nonfiction. Mike Erganian: Good I ...
Red: I could see why some of the boys took him for snobby. He had a quiet way about him, a walk and a talk that just wasn't normal around here. He strolled, like a man in a park without a care or a worry in the world, like he had on an invisible coat...
Sweeney Todd: [sings] The history of the world, my love... Mrs. Lovett: [sings] Save a lot of graves, does a lot of relatives favors. Sweeney Todd: Is those below serving those up above. Mrs. Lovett: Everybody shaves, so there should be plenty of fla...
Spock: I am as conflicted as I once was as a child. Sarek: You will always be a child of two worlds. I am grateful for this, and for you. Spock: I feel anger for the one who took Mother's life - an anger I *cannot* control. Sarek: I believe... that s...
Scott Pilgrim: Oh God! Wallace Wells: What is it, Scott? Scott Pilgrim: I had this totally weird dream... Other Scott: Oh God! Wallace Wells: What is it, Other Scott? Other Scott: Can we skip the dream time? Color me not interested. Scott Pilgrim: Bu...
Joe Turner: Listen. I work for the CIA. I am not a spy. I just read books! We read everything that's published in the world. And we... we feed the plots - dirty tricks, codes - into a computer, and the computer checks against actual CIA plans and ope...
Private Edward P. Train: [narration] This great evil, where's it come from? How'd it steal into the world? What seed, what root did it grow from? Who's doing this? Who's killing us, robbing us of life and light, mocking us with the sight of what we m...
Willy Wonka: Don't you know what this is? Violet Beauregarde: By gum, it's gum. Willy Wonka: [happily, but sarcastically] Wrong! It's the most amazing, fabulous, sensational gum in the whole world. Violet Beauregarde: What's so fab about it? Willy Wo...
Uncle Monty: The older order changeth, yielding place to new. God fulfils himself in many ways. And soon, I suppose, I shall be swept away by some vulgar little tumour. Oh, my boys, my boys, we're at the end of an age. We live in a land of weather fo...
Rorschach: I heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Life seems harsh, and cruel. Says he feels all alone in threatening world. Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pic...
Jon Osterman: Reassembling myself was the first trick I learned. It didn't kill Osterman... did you really think it would kill me? I have walked across the surface of the Sun. I have witnessed events so tiny and so fast they can hardly be said to hav...