Patrick: Hey, everyone! Every body! Everyone, raise your glasses to Charlie. Charlie: What did I do? Patrick: You didn't do anything. We just want to toast to our new friend. You see things and you understand. You're a wallflower. [Charlie gets embar...
Glen: Say that reminds me, how'd you get that kid so darn fast? Me and Dot went in to adopt on account a' somethin' went wrong with my semen, and they said we had to wait five years for a healthy white baby. I said, "Healthy white baby? Five years? W...
H.I.: What are you talkin' about, Glen? Glen: What am I talkin' about? I'm talkin' about sex, boy, what the hell you talkin' about? I'm talkin' about l'amour! I'm talkin' that me and Dot are swingers, as in "to swing." I'm talkin' about wife swappin'...
Dot: I'm sure you have the life insurance squared away? Ed McDonnough: Have we done that honey? We gotta do that honey! Dot: You gotta do that HI! Ed's got her hands full with this little angel. H.I.: Yes, ma'am. Dot: What would Ed and little angel d...
William Somerset: I just don't think I can continue to live in a place that embraces and nurtures apathy as if it was virtue. David Mills: You're no different. You're no better. William Somerset: I didn't say I was different or better. I'm not. Hell,...
Young Charlie: We just sort of go along and nothing happens. We're in a terrible rut. It's been on my mind for months. What's gonna be our future? Joseph Newton: Oh, come now, Charlie. Things aren't as bad as that. The bank gave me a raise last Janua...
2nd Lt. Greenhill: Can't I stay? Please? Reverend Clayton: Oh, all right. But you watch me, boy! I'm the hardcase you're up against out here, not them childish savages! And if you don't hear my first holler, you better read my mind 'cause I don't aim...
[last title cards] Title card: In 1968, "At Folsom Prison" became one of the most popular recordings of all time, outselling even the Beatles. Title card: That same year, John and June married and settled into the lake home in Hendersonville. Two yea...
Roger Rabbit: [singing] My buddy's Eddie V. / A sourpuss, you'll see / But when I'm done, he'll need no gun / 'Cause a joker he will be / C-D-E-F-G-H-I / I... love to raise some Cain / Believe me, it's no strain / It feels so great to smash a plate /...
Sister Mary Stigmata: [after chasing Jake and Elwood out of her office with a ruler for using foul language] You are such a disappointing pair. I prayed so hard for you. It saddens and hurts me that the two young men whom I raised to believe in the T...
[With other poor black seniors, watching Chance on TV] Louise: It's for sure a white man's world in America. Look here: I raised that boy since he was the size of a piss-ant. And I'll say right now, he never learned to read and write. No, sir. Had no...
This is good and hot." "I remember you used to say that about someone I know." He shakes his head. "Give it up, Scotts. That boat sailed, sank, and got towed." "But..." "No. It ain't going to happen." He sits down next to me and I curl up next to him...
This time he was underwater, running, feet sinking deeper and deeper into the seabed. The surface was within reach if he raised his arms, but he couldn’t get his head out of the water. He had to breathe. The compulsion to inhale was huge. But he co...
The light clicks on, right above my head, drawing my eyes to it. The moment I look up, squinting, I know I’m in trouble. There isn’t even a guy leaning against the corner, trying to play bad cop. There isn’t a guy smiling and offering me a cup ...
One likes to think that there is some fantastic limbo for the children of imagination, some strange, impossible place where the beaux of Fielding may still make love to the belles of Richardson, where Scott’s heroes still may strut, Dickens’s del...
I put my hand on his arm. "You know, Drew was exaggerating. I'm a nice person. Most of the time." Jake raised an eyebrow, the hint of a smile on his lips. "So, you didn't really slap a guy in the middle of someone's wedding?" I bit my lip. "Technical...
Communities are not built of friends, or of groups of people with similar styles and tastes, or even of people who like and understand each other. They are built of people who feel they are part of something that is bigger than themselves: a shared g...
Then his fingers trembled on her ankle—tightened around her foot. His head shifted, turning toward her. With a growl, she crashed the poker down onto his head. His hand jerked. A gurgling noise arose, not from his throat but from his chest, from de...
It’s true that the hatred is still there. But it doesn’t change anything. Our obligations are the same—to live and sanctify all life with our own. To participate in the world the best we know how, leaving it a better place than we found it. To ...
When I was about nine, my siblings and I fell out of our moving van at an intersection. My dad didn’t notice for about five blocks. It was back before seat belts. It was also back before parents used any sort of common sense whatsoever. It was a ti...
Having it all is just too much hassle. I'm not every-woman. I'm a working woman. And I'm not entirely sure I see the oint of being as dexterous in the kitchen as I am at my desk. If Mr. Y is perfectly satisfied with pre-packaged sushi every night, th...