[immediately after making love with Max] Diana Christensen: What's really bugging me now is my daytime programming. NBC's got a lock on daytime - lousy game shows - and I'd like to bust them. I'm thinking of doing a homosexual soap opera, "The Dykes"...
Frank Hackett: Mr. Jensen is unhappy with Howard Beale and wants him discontinued. Diana Christensen: He may be unhappy, but he isn't stupid enough to withdraw the number one show on television out of pique. Frank Hackett: Two billion dollars is not ...
[Grandma Sarah notices that Lone Watie has painted his face] Grandma Sarah: What's all that paint about? Lone Watie: It's my death face. Grandma Sarah: You know, we're sure gonna show them redskins somethin' tomorrow. No offense meant. Lone Watie: No...
Inigo Montoya: [drunk] I am waiting for you, Vizzini! You told me to go back to the beginning... so I have. [widen to show Inigo sitting in a heap against a house, swilling from a bottle] Inigo Montoya: This is where I am, this is where I'll stay. I ...
Jack Barry: Eleven points will bring you to 21 and you will be our new champion! Because of a disagreement with his commanding general, Ulysses S. Grant was virtually placed under arrest for a brief time early in 1862. Who was the commanding general ...
[showing customers in the shop a TV set, sounding bored out of his mind, almost a zombie, in a droning voice] Shaun: This one comes with a basic sort of digital package, uh, you got your Lifestyle Channels there, a bit of "Trisha," um, you got "Enter...
Crabbin: [inviting Holly Martins to give a lecture at the local Cultural Reeducation Society] We do a little show each week. Last week we had "Hamlet." The week before we had... something. Sgt. Paine: The striptease, sir. Crabbin: Yes, the Hindu danc...
Jeffrey Goines: There was this guy, and he was always requesting shows that had already played. Yes. No. You have to tell her before. He couldn't quite grasp the idea that the charge nurse couldn't make it be yesterday. She couldn't turn back time, t...
[first lines] Christof: We've become bored with watching actors give us phony emotions. We are tired of pyrotechnics and special effects. While the world he inhabits is, in some respects, counterfeit, there's nothing fake about Truman himself. No scr...
Travel Agent: Where would you like to go? Truman: Fiji. Travel Agent: When? Truman: [pats his suitcase] Today. Travel Agent: [types on her computer] Oh, I'm sorry, but we don't have another flight for a least a month. Truman: A month? Travel Agent: I...
Christof: As Truman grew up, we were forced to manufacture ways to keep him on the island. [flashback to Truman at school] Young Truman: I like to be an explorer, like the great Magellan. Teacher: [rolling down a map of the world] Oh, you're too late...
Marlon: Where the hell's Fiji? Near Florida? Truman: [pointing to golf ball] See here? Marlon: Yeah. Truman: This is us... [guides finger halfway around ball] Truman: and all the way around here... FIJI. You can't get any further away before you star...
Truman Burbank: Lauren, right? It's on your book. Lauren: Lauren. Right. Right. Truman Burbank: Well, I'm Truman. Lauren: Yeah. I know. Look, Truman, I'm not allowed to talk to you. You know. Truman Burbank: Yeah, well, I can understand, I'm a pretty...
Gordon Deitrich: [about his TV show] We threw out the censor-approved script and shot a new one that I wrote this morning. Evey Hammond: [dumbfounded] Oh, my God... [Evey gulps her champagne as the TV camera pans over the clapping audience, revealing...
Willy Wonka: [Showing off his geese that lay golden eggs] They're laying overtime right now, for Easter. Mike Teevee: But Easter's over! Willy Wonka: [clapping a hand over Mike's mouth] Ssshhh! [quietly] Willy Wonka: They don't know that. I'm trying ...
Judge Doom: Have they got the will or not? Smart Ass: Nah, just a stupid love letter. Judge Doom: No matter. I doubt the will'll show up in the next fifteen minutes, anyway. Eddie Valiant: What happens in the next fifteen minutes? Judge Doom: Toontow...
Stu: You owe me some money. Stu's friend: Come on, Stu. Stu: No one takes a beating like that without a mark to show for it. Stu's friend: Come on, Stu... Stu: [leans in, whispering] I know what you are. Wolverine: You lost your money. You keep this ...
I don't know a lot of show runners. I mean I met a lot of them in picket lines. I'm not part of a, like, secret society or pickup basketball game. As far as I'm concerned, pick-up basketball games are secret societies. They confuse me. I've never bee...
I had no idea how difficult Sondheim's music would be. All through the rehearsals, I kept flubbing. There were so many tempo changes. I could never get through the opening number without any mistakes. One day, I went up to Hal Prince and offered to l...
I've become a workaholic. When the shows slow down and there's no press and I can get my time to myself in the studio with my music, I get into this zone, man. I enter this incredible space where I'm just making music. And I feel like I can work with...
Charlie Kaufman: But, so anyway, I was also wondering, I'm going up to Santa Barbara this Saturday, for an orchid show, and I, and I... Alice the Waitress: Oh. Charlie Kaufman: I'm sorry. Alice the Waitress: Well... Charlie Kaufman: I apologise. I'm ...
