Quotes of: Picture-book Keyword

Don’t kiss in public, unless it’s midnight and you’re both wearing black so nobody can see you’re naked. 

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All I know is I don’t know if I know, and this everlasting oscillation shakes my belief system.

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There should be a language called Nail, so I could more naturally say, “My nail is a bit rusty.

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I’m so excited and lonely all at once. Just once. Not twice, because that’d be a couple, and couple’s can’t be lonely. 

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I skimmed the pond scum with a spoon like broth in a soup bowl. Why does everything have to remind me of her?

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I put the men in mental. Well, me and my clones do. Alone I just put in the man.

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The event happened on my birthday. I don’t remember the date, I only know it was my birthday because there was no cake or presents.

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I’ll give you money to buy what I’m selling, because I’m a savvy salesman.

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Aside from the fact that you’re not my son, and I’m not a woman, do you think I’m a good mother?

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I make music like I make love—in a group. OK, so I’m not in a band, and I sing alone in the shower.

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At the end of the universe you’ll find a door labeled “Do Not Enter.” No great mysteries are hidden there—it’s just a supplies closet.

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I’m going outside to get a breath of fresh air. Anybody got a cigarette I can have?

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On the frozen tundra, I milked a cow and pumped out ice cream. Strangely, it had chunks of strawberries in it.

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I drive by the spot of my injury, because each time I do, the pain lessens, and it teaches me a lesson.

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My face doesn’t match my personality. Maybe it would if instead of a mouth I had an asshole in its place. 

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My philosophy on life: On a burrito, the cheese goes underneath the sour cream. Otherwise, how will it melt?

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I bought an empty safe, and I keep it empty, because safety doesn’t exist, so my safes are full of their potential.

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I need to dig a hole the size of the Grand Canyon to bury all of my problems.

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An invisible wall of super condensed jelly would make a great shield to stop bullets and sarcasm.

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I just realized my reality, and I’d like to say No Thanks. I’m going back to sleep.

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Her legs are so long and sexy that I can see them 26.2 miles away. Gatorade. 

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